Average customer rating:
- Great book!
- Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me: How to Recognize and Manage the Narcissists in Your Life
- Ugly Ugly Business
- learning to cope with narcissistic behavior
- In a Nutshell
|
Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me: How to Recognize and Manage the Narcissists in Your Life
Les Carter
Manufacturer: Jossey-Bass
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
 Interpersonal Relations
| Relationships
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Self-Help
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Psychology & Counseling
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
Personality
| Psychology & Counseling
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
Look Inside Health Books
| Trip
| Specialty Stores
| Books
Similar Items:
-
Why Is It Always About You? : The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism
-
Loving the Self-Absorbed: How to Create a More Satisfying Relationship with a Narcissistic Partner
-
Help, I'm in Love with a Narcissist
-
The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family
-
When Your "Perfect Partner" Goes Perfectly Wrong: Loving Or Leaving The Narcissist In Your Life
ASIN: 0787980633 |
Book Description
Those who are in the unenviable position of living or working with a narcissist have learned by sad trial and error that they are the only one in the relationship who can change the dynamic. Certainly narcissists don’t think they need to change. Enough About You, Let’s Talk About Me is a hands-on resource for helping colleagues, families, and spouses deal with people who exhibit narcissistic tendencies by learning how to change their own attitudes and responses.
Customer Reviews:
Great book!.......2007-08-10
This book was excellent in helping me relate in a healthy way with my husband. It was very encouraging and, rather than taking away hope, restored it. I would highly recommend it to anyone dealing with someone they love who has narcissistic tendancies.
Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me: How to Recognize and Manage the Narcissists in Your Life.......2007-03-26
I am not a big self help book reader but a friend told me to read this one and she was not wrong. This is one to keep as a reference book. It is great!! Cleanly written with great examples. I have to deal with narcissists in my work place and this book has become invaluable. I recommend it highly for anyone who has to deal with narcissists in their lives. The best one I have read on the topic....
Ugly Ugly Business.......2007-03-23
Before I stumbled onto this book , I had no idea this was a pychiatric personality disorder with a name, let alone that it had a whole small genre of books about it. To say that I feel satisfyingly validated for having read this book is a huge understatement. I want to give it 5 stars just for existing.
Every single suggestion in the book that the author offers, I have tried. The main advice, in a nutshell, is to be true to yourself and your values while being as respectful to the Narcissist as you can. While I have done this, and like to think this is my main M.O., I will also add that it never provides any sense of satisfaction that you have handled a sticky situation well. The author's argument is that if you act accordingly, at least you can feel good about yourself and probably prevent making the situation worse. I say maybe so, maybe not. Part of the frustration is that you never know! Given this, I say do whatever makes you feel best (blowing your stack at them sometimes feels really good).
While I am very grateful for this book, I am not giving it 5 stars for the following reasons:
1) Lopsided Content.
Anyone who has a Narcissist in their life, is already, sadly, extremely well-versed in what the characteristics are and how they manifest. I would have liked to have seen fewer pages on characteristic description and case studies reinforcing, and way more pages on useful tips.
2) Unanswered Questions.
The author (and others in the field) feels strongly that a Narcissist won't change. While I tend to agree, a couple of questions have always gnawed at me:
Why do they not emotionally and verbally attack small children - i.e. under age 10? ....... Or friend acquaintances?
That they choose not to, clearly indicates to me that they are aware of their behavior and can alter it when they choose. It shows they don't think it is worth attacking people who wouldn't "get it." So, if they can alter themselve to fit the audience and the situation, then why can't we get them to change?
As an aside, the part in the book about Narcissists being indulged as small children during the time when they need to be taught that, although, loved, the world does NOT actually revolve around them was very helpful. It perfectly fit to explain my Narcissist. It was also good for me to read as a parent of small children.
All in all, a good book which I recommend.
learning to cope with narcissistic behavior.......2007-03-03
This was a really great book on learning to identify someone in your life who is narcissistic and effective ways of managing their behavior (and yours!!) People who are always right, whose ideas and plans must over ride all others, who manage to draw attention to themselves for every positive thing that they do (and why!!) and who somehow always manage to leave you feeling guilty and/or angry at the way the situation turns out.....these are the people that are written about in this book. The strategy for coping with and deflecting the behavior of a narcissist was well thought out and can be implemented by anyone..........it just takes a bit of thought and the refusal to join into the narcissists' game.
I felt that this book had enough detail to inform and yet not overwhelm you. The look at the "heart" (they have one!?!?) of the narcissist was thought provoking but in the end the fact remains that you can not change that person no matter how hard you want to or how determined you may be. If you keep this individual in your life for whatever reason, you must learn to recognize their behavior and manage it in order for you to live a "normal" life.
In a Nutshell.......2007-02-23
This book describes narcissists, their behavior and their manipulations. If you are forced, either by relation or marriage, etc, to be around these people, this book helps you realize that YOU are not the problem, even though the narcissist thinks everyone else is the problem, not themselves.
If you don't have to be around them, this book tells you that is exactly what you should do. Avoid these people like the plague. And reading books like this may help us to recognize and avoid these rattlesnakes in the future.
I thought this was a very enlightening book.
Book Description
This is a book about the Bible, but not just another book about the Bible! Written in an engaging style with humor, anecdotes, and stories, this book tells you everything you want to know about the Bible … well… not really everything but enough to get you started.
Customer Reviews:
Excellent resource for Bible Study.......2007-01-04
My young adults class asked for help understanding the Bible and we found this resource through someone who was using it at another church. It is an excellent overview of how the Bible came to be written and the themes of Scripture. I use it in a chapter a week format and supplement the text with closer study of relevant Scripture passages. Keep this resource in mind as you look for help to understand the Bible.
not very good..........2006-02-05
i've read many outlines in this bible outline vien. read, 'what the bible is all about for young explorers' by henrietta mears.
Book Description
Once upon a time, equipped with a solid marriage, driven careers, and a recently finished basement, my husband and I were ready to start a family. Like many 30-something couples, we thought it would be easy. Unfortunately, after nearly 18 months of doing things "the old fashioned way," my husband was diagnosed with a latent birth defect. It rendered us virtually infertile, not to mention devastated and confused.
The remarkable thing about confusion is that it can spur knowledge and strength. Infertility did just that for us. We moved forward to try to have a child with the help of science and technology. Before we could blink, we were in the midst of monumental efforts to finance our baby-making venture, ordering medications on the Internet, and undergoing multiple, sometimes risky, and invasive, procedures. We endured it all for a single chance to have a child of our own.
Pregnancy Wishes & IVF Dreams: A Story & Lessons About Life, Love, & Infertility is a compelling and insightful look at one couple's struggle with male factor infertility and everything that goes with it. From failed attempts at conception, batteries of fertility tests, and a devastating diagnosis, to IVF/ICSI, other treatments, and ultimately the birth of fraternal twin daughters, Pregnancy Wishes & IVF Dreams offers readers a sense of shared experience through a real-time, personal story. The book also provides first-hand insights, guidance, and quotes covering a range of universal issues including dealing with jealousy, great expectations, doctors, risk, finances, and family. Finally, Pregnancy Wishes comes full circle, leaving readers with twelve, invaluable lessons-learned about life, love, infertility, and numerous questions, and challenges in between.
Like an understanding friend, Pregnancy Wishes & IVF Dreams will leave you feelings less alone, and more empowered as you cope with infertility.
Customer Reviews:
a must read, must buy book.......2007-04-11
Pregancy Wishes and IVF Dreams is an honest and touching account of a couples difficulties with conceiving a child. I have not had to experience infertility directly, but I have a sister and a friend who did. I could also relate to and empathize with Kelley's story as the mother of two children. Kelley Taylor's book is an inspirational story about the challenges that life can present to the reader. It's a must read book for anyone who is facing infertiltity as well as those who have a loved one or friend who is experiencing infertility.
Book Description
The Complete
Narcissist's Guide
Mimi E. Gotist delivers a gift for our times: practical, simple guidance to help you cope with the self-loving people in your life-while nurturing your own inner narcissist.
At once utterly self-absorbed, and charmingly aware of it, Gotist offers advice on:
Dating: You're not looking for the person you want to marry -- you're looking for the person you want to change
Career: Don't work -- work it
Spirituality: Me Here Now
Personal Growth: You can't help anyone who won't help you
Customer Reviews:
I laughed a little too hard..............2003-06-12
I got this as a birthday gift, from my sister no less. At first I was insulted, and then I started reading and couldn't stop laughing. This is a great send-up of the self-help, I'm-OK-you're-OK genre that says all we have to do is acknowledge our fear of failure, selfish behavior, and loathing of humanity and then miraculously everything will be OK.
While Mimi's discourses on "The Tyranny of Sharing" and "How to Avoid Socially Conscious Religions" are funny - there's also some truth to it all. It's as if she climbed into my brain and interviewed the mean, selfish other twin (I'm a Gemini) who seldom shows his public face. For anyone who's lived through all the self-help trends from EST to Marianne Williamson to Dianetics, this is a hysterical book.
A fabulous gift for the narcissist - or self-help junkie - in your life.
Alarmingly Funny.......2003-06-04
I was a little alarmed when this book was sent to me as an anonymous gift. With trepidation, I started reading it -- and laughed so hard I forgot to be alarmed. I was then alarmed all over again when I realized how much I identified with Ms. Gotist. So much so that I've now started reading the book again. Highly enjoyable!
Enough About Ewe.......2003-05-18
Mimi E. Gotist has nailed the self-help, self-empowered, spiritual, survival, highly-effective, Martha-Stewart-Living, bologna soup for the soul genre. Starting with the front cover, (by "uncritically self-acclaimed author), moving to the dedication, ("To me, me and only Mimi), throughout the "Seven-Steps", all the way to the "Begrudging Acknowledgements" and the
typeface ("Narcissus Boldfacias"), Mimi never stops. Mix yourself a generous mimitini (three ounces iced Grey Goose vodka, six citrus-stuffed olives on the side, to minimize vodka displacement), grab your biggest diamond-encrusted mirror, lie down in front of your oversized Aspen fireplace and let Mimi show you how to deal with all those self-loving people in your life, including, guess who? YOU!
Don't forget to check out her website...and buy yourself a pair of ENOUGH ABOUT EWE (tm) Sheepish Slippers. "Crafted from fleece made from recycled low-fat soymilk bottles, for a look and feel that's so lifelike only Ewe will know the difference."...
The Best !! (But perhaps not for YOU....).......2003-05-17
Howling-out-loud-funny (and a bit too much identification....) on the ways, dreams and aspirations of the Fabulous Narcissists!! This book is not, of course, for the masses (OP/Ordinary Person as Me-Me calls THEM), only for the Select Few (as IIIII call them!!)
If you're Good Enough and can Understand put this one in your Personal Organizer(or have one of your Staff)rush out to get it ASAP!!!
Hilarious.......2003-05-17
My friend gave me this for a BDAY gift and I immediately fell off my chair laughing. Enough About You is one of those laugh out loud books -- almost every page has a funny joke. It was a great gift.
Amazon.com
More of a literary adventure than an actual autobiography, David Shields's Enough About You: Adventures in Autobiography presents a collection of loosely organized, self-reflective essays, ranging from such disparate topics as the author's past, dreams, and heroes to his thoughts on basketball, Jewish culture, and Bill Murray. Uniting the book is Shields's examination of autobiography, his interest in the way we identify ourselves, and the most effective ways of investigating and communicating our identity.
Shields writes with convincing intelligence and fluidity on the book's more academic topics, such as the effectiveness of Nabokov's structure by memory association in Speak, Memory and Renata Adler's use of collage in Speedboat. Yet when he emulates such works with random glimpses into his own past and character, he doesn't provide enough personal detail to make effective use of these techniques. He's a bit too preoccupied with theory to offer a satisfying self-portrait. Ultimately, Shields seems distracted by the need to cover all his critical bases and make a postmodern statement, consequently distracting and distancing the reader from establishing much of a connection with the author. He writes in the book's prologue that he "wants to cut to the absolute bone" of "his own damned, doomed character," yet admits in the epilogue to having falsified much of its personal information. It's unfortunate that he doesn't let his academic guard down more often, because what personal insight he does provide (accurate or otherwise) is very entertaining. He recognizes the absurd self-absorption inherent in memoir, and that goes a long way in a book about the subject. An interesting if flawed experiment, Enough About You should nonetheless appeal to memoir enthusiasts looking for perceptive and humorous views on our own perpetual self-fascination. --Ross Doll
Book Description
Enough About You is a book about David Shields. But it is also a terrifically engrossing exploration and exploitation of self-reflection, self-absorption, full-blown narcissism, and the impulse to write about oneself.
In a world awash with memoirs and tell-alls, Shields has created something unique: he invites the reader into his mind as he turns his life into a narrative. With moving and often hilarious candor, Shields ruminates on a variety of subjects, all while exploring the impulse to confess, to use oneself as an autobiographical subject, to make one's life into a work of art.
Shields explores the connections between fiction and nonfiction, stuttering and writing, literary forms and literary contents, art and life; he confronts bad reviews of his earlier books; he examines why he read a college girlfriend's journal; he raids a wide range of cultural figures (from Rousseau, Nabokov, and Salinger to Bill Murray, Adam Sandler, and Bobby Knight) for what they have to tell him about himself; he quotes a speech he wrote on the occasion of his father's ninetieth birthday and then gives us the guilt-induced dream he had when he failed to deliver the speech; he also writes about basketball and sexuality and Los Angeles and Seattle, but he is always meditating on the origins of his interest in autobiography, on the limits and appeals of autobiography, on the traps and strategies of it, and finally, how to use it to get to the world.
The result is a collection of poetically charged self-reflections that reveal deep truths about ourselves as well.
Customer Reviews:
Give Yourself a Chance.......2004-07-17
I never suspected that David Shields Enough About You, Adventures in Autobiography would be able to take me to the introspective and invigorated terrain I found myself wandering by the time I had reached its close. Anyone who doubts that autobiographical work has the ability to deliver the proverbial "literary goods", or who has mistakenly identified as the exclusive domain of "great fiction" the pleasures, the insights, or the lingering pain we adoringly call "emotional power", has obviously not read Shields' transformative work.
Enough About You is a string of disparate fragmented passages, a protracted collage. Of particular interest to me was the essay on Bill Murray (which alone should be anthology material on the study of humor theory), and a magnetic retelling of the old "I read your journals" teen-love thread. The connections are scattered and loose, sometimes you find yourself reviewing, going back to other bits, or trying to figure why things seem related. Memoir and essay make up a major portion of the content, strung together on the surface only by the mental activity of the reader.
I have to admit, I backpedaled against what I thought was only going to be a lolling stream of rambles, self-conscious childhood reveries and literary cliquishness. That's the postmodern trap, you know: fragmentation (collage) and use of the first person have often been a way to spiral a story into self-obsessed rigor mortis. At the universities and literary circles, these works are often the roadkilled raccoon around which the critics gather and plant their mental maggots for years of discussion. Referencing the self, along with so-called "creative non-fiction", and most other conventional "reality based" postmodernisms are academic buzzings so overused and overstated, any hint of them will usually flick me to a fitful, nervous sleep.
But it didn't take long before I realized that with David Shields, I was seeing the residuals of a different kind of thinking; his work is developed and spicy and poignant and has an uncanny ability to set your insides a-churning. More importantly, it's a lot of fun to read.
The passages are always short and pithy, and they are nearly-every one of them tasty mouthfuls. This is an example of where the "good read" stuff started to sneak in, despite my critical cynicism. Somehow I felt like I was cheating, like the bon-bon wrappers were piling up around me and I was having too much fun.
Shields takes a moment to clarify himself. While giving us a book review, says he loves collage pieces because "they're all madly in love with their own crises." The fragments work themselves back together. He seems to say, "yes, you're doing some of the work, but what did you see?" He shows us, especially critics like myself, that our issues are our own, and what we get from a writer is at least as much about ourselves as it is about what they are offering. He also makes a compelling argument that our greatest qualities are often one in the same with our deepest flaws.
Resist if you must. I did.
Enough self-absorbed nonsense.......2004-01-09
This book is the most self-absorbed bunch of nonsense I've ever read. It was a struggle to read it. It was a struggle to finish it.
It seems to be about three things:
1) Showing that David Shields is in touch with pop culture, for he goes into an in-depth analysis of an Adam Sandler SNL song.
2) Showing that DS has read a lot of books and can write plot summaries of them -- there's more of that here than on Amazon.com. Well, perhaps an exaggeration.
3) Showing that DS is cool about his sexual past.... Such false modesty.
It was a waste of time reading it, and I only finished it because I hate not finishing a book more.
Hard not to like this book.......2003-04-20
There are so many autobiographies on the shelves that I hardly even scan the titles anymore; the genre is glutted with personalities and at the same time starving for personality.
Enough About You is a different kind of memoir, not interested in telling the same tired old stories about "how I got to be who I am today," or "what I learned from all of this," it spends much more time trying to capture the feeling of being human, with its awkwardness, uncertainty and absurdity. It's a much more believable book, certainly, and much more honest with the reader and with itself than almost anything else I've ever read.
I recommend it because it breathes new life into a genre that is by and large stuck in a rut. Besides that, it's got some funny parts, too.
Just Connect.......2002-06-12
I fell in love with David Shields's
when it appeared in 1996 for its hip, critifictional meditations on avant-pop irreality. What's wonderful about
for me is much of the same I found wonderful about that earlier book: its richly, painfully conflicted simultaneous engagement with/distance from the media-sphere and thus the world, its sharp and eccentric and ultimately revealing readings of everything from Renata Adler to Bill Murray and back again by way of basketball, some paragraphs to simply die for. What separates
from
, unless maybe I remember
wrong after all these years away from it, is how
moves through the self, through the self's remoteness, in an attempt to reestablish connection by means of its trope that "I am you. We're all just us." Granted, it a strange, sometimes desperate, even quaint humanist gesture, but in the end in this admirable work it feels funny, engaging, and right.
Painfully self-revealing..........2002-06-03
Halfway through this book I lost myself somewhere in the story: I found that I was learning something there by heart. Enough About You is not only a painfully self-revealing illustration of its author, David Shields, but also a portrait of our universal givings and misgivings. Despite his (our) flaws, he is still able to embrace himself, his relationship with others, and the world. Woven throughout these stories (the chapters can be read as independent essays or as a novel exploring the same theme) are reflections on the interactions between reader, writer, and human beings in general. The book works on a number of different levels: as simple stories of a boy growing up, as reflections on the authorial process, and as a more complex statement of the nature of life and love.
Customer Reviews:
"but enough about you..." is never enough!.......2000-03-27
Out of print,(and seriously impossible to find even in danky lower east side usually dependable second hand book sellers ) this early Heimel work is being held onto with tight fingers by everyone who was smart enough not to loan their copy to any fellow Cynthia fan. I have lost the book forever to what I thought wss a trusted friend, and I can hardly blame her. This book is fresh, at- her -height- single- by- choice-swearing-like-a- scurvied- sailor Heimel. Every page barely contains the color and her voice is vivid, and absolutley tight. Do not look for Heimel the nurturing, matured friend. This is the Heimel who gives leaky advice- and is so much fun. This is where her ficitonal "Problem Lady" column made its' first appearance and even though she is obviously writing both the letters and the advice, you hardly care. The form is her born arena. Sounding british in the way only a Yank can, and a true New Yorker could. This is Cynthia before she even dreamed of moving to that ulitimate traitor territory; L.A. When on tour for her last book ( in the late ninties, where the hell is her new delayed and delayed novel? dont hold your breath girls...) I asked her if "But enough about you..."was up for printing in the forseeable future and she laughed. I wonder if I have a copy, she mused. Maybe one day I'll find it. It is probably in the land of rings I'll never see again and can't quite remember losing, soiled qtips ( where do qtips go?) and all those thank you cards that got 'lost in the mail'.
Books:
- Everyday Pasta
- Extreme Fat Smash Diet
- For One More Day
- For Women Only: What You Need to Know about the Inner Lives of Men
- Gulliver's Travels (Signet Classics)
- Heat: An Amateur's Adventures as Kitchen Slave, Line Cook, Pasta-Maker, and Apprentice to a Dante-Quoting Butcher in Tuscany
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
Books Index
Books Home
Recommended Books
- Edward Abbey: A Life
- Ben & Jerry's Homemade Ice Cream & Dessert Book
- The Slynx
- Thirteen Moons: A Novel
- Twister On Tuesday
- Chaos and Nonlinear Dynamics: An Introduction for Scientists and Engineers
- A Traveler's Guide to 116 Michigan Lighthouses
- Global Health Care Markets: A Comprehensive Guide to Regions, Trends, and Opportunities Shaping the
- Who is Supervising the Supervisor
- Global Market Share Planner: Americas
