Book Description
The children in this book defy the stereotypes of urban youth too frequently presented by the media. Tender, generous and often religiously devout, they speak with eloquence and honesty about the poverty and racial isolation that have wounded but not hardened them.
The book does not romanticize or soften the effects of violence and sickness. One fourth of the child-bearing women in the neighborhoods where these children live test positive for HIV. Pediatric AIDs, life-consuming fires and gang rivalries take a high toll. Several children die during the year in which this narrative takes place.
A gently written work, Amazing Grace asks questions that are at once political and theological. What is the value of a child's life? What exactly do we plan to do with those whom we appear to have defined as economically and humanly superfluous? How cold -- how cruel, how tough -- do we dare be?
Customer Reviews:
A compelling eye-opener.......2007-09-10
Kozol's Amazing Grace is a true eye-opener. After reading it, I feel that I had nothing close to an accurate image of the conditions of poverty that people still live in in some of the inner city neighborhoods. The reality Kozol awakens us to shatters the illusion America holds of "equal opportunity for all," and the book is an indictment of a far-too-unaware society run by politicians who must think about quick fixes (prisons, tax cuts) that try to please voters or address problem symptoms rather than causes (terrible schools, decrepit surroundings, congestion of the homeless, and the not-always subtle discrimination that continues in society). A truly important book, which will challenge any readers who are supportive of Rudy Giuliani to defend his startling insensitivity to the issue, displayed by his cutting of funding of public services that are so crucial to many people Kozol writes of.
Out of Sight, Out of Mind.......2007-08-20
Jonathan Kozol has dedicated his work on bringing light to the inequalities that exist within our nation. These inequalities are best seen, unfortunately but not unexpectedly, along racial lines. "Amazing Grace: The Lives of Children and the Conscience of a Nation" is a book with a lot of questions, a lot of shocking information, but not a lot of answers; if only because the answers may not exist. It is a stunning look at the deep disparity between rich and poor within our nation.
Kozol focuses on the South Bronx ghetto of Mott Haven, the poorest borough in New York, clearly segregated from the middle and upper classes, where two-thirds of the population are Hispanic and one-third African-American. Through interviews with school children, teachers, ministers, and community members, Kozol paints a bleak picture of the equally bleak lives led by those who live in this area. He recounts stories of buildings where wires have been eaten through by rats that are the size of squirrels, of drugs being bought and sold openly on the streets (although the drug dealers have enough respect to break when school lets out), and of families too numerous to count who are being killed off one by one by AIDS. The way these children see the world is frightenly dead-on; they know when they're not wanted because it's proven to them everyday in the way they have to live.
"Amazing Grace" is not an easy read due to its topic matter. Kozol's style is matter-of-fact, made up of usually uninterrupted comments by those he's interviewed, sometimes with his questions thrown in, and his own comments and hypotheses as to how this can go on. But Kozol doesn't necessarily have answers or even blame. Surely, some blame has to go to a system that keeps the poorest people with the least chance for success segregated from others, a separation of the haves and have nots to the greatest degree. And certainly others would place the blame on the poor people themselves. Perhaps it's a combination of a lot of factors, not one or the other, but what is certain is that too little is being done (or maybe can be done) to make a difference before it is too late.
An important book.......2007-06-25
It is a book about children. Children who live in Mott Haven, one of the poorest neighbourhoods in the South Bronx. I have almost never read anything that has moved me and at the same time disturbed me as this book has. Jonathan Kozol has with great care and sensitivity interviewed children living in this place that's both crime ridden and run down. Most of these kids start off as being trusting and innocent but grow into becoming more and more disillusioned about their surroundings and hope for survival. The HIV and AIDS virus has really hit hard in these places and this is connected to the large amount of the population that abuse heroin. The heroin has such self-mocking names as "Jungle Fever", "Black Sabbath", "DOA"(dead on arrival), and "True Power". Many of the children are born to addicted mothers, some of who are in jail, already contracting the disease in utero. First time mothers have an average age between 16 and 17, while grandmothers can be in their late thirties and great great grandmothers in their late 50s.
Its incredible how close Jonathan Kozol manages to come to these kids. They really take him in and open up their hearts. They share with him their stories. These stories are full of horrible and painful things that are so far from the realities that we experience here in modern day big city Stockholm. The segregation in these South Bronx neighborhoods is total, whether it's the schools, hospitals, or prisons. And almost always the kids receive the short end of the stick. Children tell of how they see murders on the street, get attacked by rats, how some are killed or burned from household fires, how some eat cold oatmeal out of the box for dinner, many of the kids live with chronic asthma due to anxiety, others live with mothers dying of AIDS, and often have classrooms that are decrepit and completely rundown. There are less qualified doctors and teachers here than anywhere else in the state of New York. There have been major tax cuts in the city that have hit these citizens hardest. Like cuts in sanitation that has resulted in mountains of garbage lining up inside buildings drawing hordes of rats. Cuts in maintenance of buildings that leave elevators broken, often resulting in playing kids falling down the elevator shafts and dying. The police refer to some of the housing projects to as "death camps" because so many drug dealers and addicts dominate them. The tax cuts have also led to many social workers losing their jobs as well as closing of several youth centers that allow kids safe places to be while their parents work. Prostitution is also common among the women. Mostly serving the truck drivers who drive through the neighborhood to deliver goods to the Hunts Point market that is close. They turn tricks for 3 to 5 dollars that go to feeding their addictions. This happens all hours of the day and night, even when the children can see. Many times when the children or adults are asked how they manage to survive they mention their faith in god and heaven. That the place that they are in now is more reminiscent of hell, but this is not where they will end up.
As a atudent of theology I cannot help but see this book as a strong wake up call. The gospels of the New Testament took the part of the poor, saying the last shall be first and the first shall be last. In the Christian nation of America that prints "In god we trust" on their coins-this is how they treat the poor. One priest who works in the South Bronx took a little kid with him when he had to drive to Queens to do some errands. There he took him to Burger King to eat. The kid had never been outside of the Bronx before. The priest later learned from the kid's teacher that he wrote an essay in school about their lunch called "My trip to Burger King"-the same way a rich kid might write about a trip he made to Florida. Most of these kids never get any Christmas or birthday presents. They don't even have their own rooms. Sleeping on sofas or on mattresses on the floor. One child says, " it feels like I'm hidden", and this is a good observation. Nobody wants to be reminded of what these children are going through. Therefore their stories are seldom, if ever, heard. This is why Jonathan Kozols book is so important. Only a short distance away just across 96th street lies the park avenue apartments that houses some of the wealthiest people in the nation, households with an average income of 300,000 dollars a year. Toward the end of the book the author talks to an old poet living in the Bronx and the start to discuss the Nazi holocaust and the concentration camps. How there are certain disturbing parallels to what happened then and whats happening now. How the outcasts and those human beings viewed as being "superfluous" are quarantined. "Its not the same" he says, "but there are some similarities. There is the feeling of eclipse. There is the likelihood of death for many. There is a sense of people watching from the outside but seeming paralyzed and doing nothing. And then there are the miracles."
Amazing Grace: Lives of Children and the Conscience of a Nation, The .......2007-05-07
I ordered a series of books for my daughter. Excellent email response, timely receipt and accurate updates of the order. More than what I expected. The materials were in good condition on arrival. Very satisfied with the service.
A Disappointing Look into a Terrible Problem.......2007-01-29
Having read Savage Inequalities by Jonathan Kozol, I expected something similar in style but different in content in Amazing Grace. I was not happy with Kozol the first time around but willing to try again, and despite my second chance this was just as disappointing. Normally in a book like this there would be a story that would connect the reader to the problem and personalize it, lots of fully cited statistics, and a workable solution. The book had only two of those, a story and statistics, which is my problem with Kozol. An excellent storyteller, he wraps you in page turning narratives, an unexpected plus in a book about America's most destitute victims of racism. Endless numbers prove his every point and bring you to his side of the table. That is not where the problem lies. Kozol's writing is simply annoying! Reading this book is like being guilt-tripped for something he makes you seem powerless over. I cannot stand that in either book he does not discuss a solution. The weakness is that it gets repetitive, going on and on with little difference between his rich people/poor people examples, however, the writing manages to stay interesting. What was most interesting was the similarity of Amazing Grace to Savage Inequalities. I thought that book was repetitive and mostly unhelpful, but now this? He even used the same school in both books and a critic of the book noted that the school he re-referenced has been repaired but Kozol had not bothered to redo his research. It is a strange feeling to read a book where the author has poorly plagiarized his own work. What is disheartening is that Kozol could write in such a selfish way. It cannot be articulated in one quote, but read the book and you will understand how he makes you feel like he is the only person in the world with a heart. It feels incomplete, and I am baffled that he did he not come across any way to help during his extensive research. I would not want to read another guilt tripping Kozol book and believe this is not an extremely important read. I would even recommend Savage Inequalities over this. I took away knowledge of a racial problem in America, but was put down by the seeming impossibility of any solution and the unnecessary jabs at anyone who is white or above the poverty line.
Casey Gollan
Book Description
“Will enrich your spirit while providing a few gentle laughs and thought provoking insights.” —Houston Chronicle. “Fifty-four esssays by some of the sharpest social observers around address everything from modern technologies to guilt-free apologies.”—Gifts and Decorative Accessories.
Customer Reviews:
Entertaining, delightful, instructive, and clever.......2005-11-18
A wonderful collaboration by a group of talented men and women that would make an excellent gift for most everyone. I will begin this review with notes on the introduction and all nine chapters and bring it to a conclusion with a bit of fanatical gushing.
The introduction of `Town & Country's Social Graces' is a cleverly written and well thought out piece written by the Editor in Chief of the magazine, Pamela Fiori. It first details why the Social Graces department was created in 1995. Then it goes on to describe some of the subjects that the article addresses. For example, some of the issues faced were about the "flagrant use of cell phones in public by people who simply cannot keep their business to themselves" and "the arrogance of certain individuals who, once in the driver's seat (literally), believe they have `The Right of Way'". It is clear by this introduction alone that the essays that fill this book are abundant with intelligence, wit, and acuity.
Chapter one comprises eight essays that focus on the subject of `Modern Times'. The first essay, `Privacy... or What's Left of It' by Jay McInerney, is about just what the title leads you to believe, privacy or lack thereof. It's told with a sense of humour but don't let the jokes fool you into thinking that the author isn't serious about humans' dwindling respect for privacy, both their own and others'. The fifth essay, `The Sound and My Fury' by William Norwich is perhaps my favourite out of the chapter because I can relate to it so well. It's about how rudely people can react when politely asked to speak more quietly when out in public, to silence their dog's incessant barking, or to take a break from playing a loud instrument in the next apartment over. A few other interesting essays that can be found in this chapter are `On Accountability', `The Etiquette of E-Mail', and `Smugly American'.
Chapter two comprises five essays written about how `Little Things Mean A Lot'. The very first essay in this chapter, `On Being a Gentleman' by David Brown, was my personal favourite. The author not only gave examples of true gentlemen and what made them so worthy of the title, but he also included a list of rules to live by. If more people were able to find it in themselves to follow at least one, two, or, even better, three of these rules on a daily basis their good attitudes would spread out like the rippling effect caused by a stone tossed into a body of water. Just imagine the possibilities. A couple other interesting chapters are `Respecting Our Elders' and `Say "Thank You"'.
Chapter three comprises seven essays written on the subject of `Family Affairs'. My favourite essay in the chapter is `Missing the Point' by Patricia Beard, which is about how adults should treat children with the same courtesy they would treat their spouse or friends. Other interesting essays are `Nagging Habits', `A Single Parent's Say', and `With All Due Respect', the latter of which concerns those irritating, though well-meaning, questions about an unborn baby to an expecting mother.
Chapter four comprises six essays written on the subject of `A Word's Worth'. The essay in this chapter that stood out most to me is `Put It in Writing' by the author of the book `The Writer's Rules', Helen Gurley Brown. The essay was about how letters, whether typed on a computer or typewriter, or handwritten will brighten somebody's day, especially if they're unexpected and much deserved. A list of clever ideas can be found to give the reader some examples of how to write a good letter, such as "short is usually better than long", "write the thank-you now", and "give a little extra thought to writing a letter expressing your anger". A couple other interesting essays are `Just Say You're Sorry' and `In Memoriam', the latter of which is about the proper etiquette that should be shown when giving eulogies and having a memorial service for a deceased loved one.
Chapter five, `Honour Thy Neighbour', comprises six essays. In this chapter, the essay that most stood out to me was `The Boor of the Grease Paint' by Wendy Wasserstein. The essay was about how carelessly disruptive people can be in theatres or, in some cases, just be plain rude to those around them. Anyone who has ever been forced to sit through a ballet, play, movie, etcetera, surrounded by people coughing, engaged in conversations on cell phones, or unwrapping candy, will appreciate this particular essay. Other essays that stood out in this chapter are `Cellular Phonies' and `Don't Waste Time'.
Chapter six comprises seven essays written about `A Touch of Tolerance'. A great essay to mention here is `Straight from the Heart' by Lauren Picker, which was about people's reactions to people who are different, such as a little girl with a hand that had not fully developed in utero and a woman who used a wheelchair. This essay did a remarkable job of pointing out that "minding your language has always been a sign of respect" and "just because a person requires a wheelchair doesn't mean her life is lacking in richness or meaning". Other insightful and thought-provoking essays are `Sobering Thoughts', `Political Stomping', and `The Measure of a Woman'.
Chapter seven comprises six essays on the subject of being the `Life of the Party'. One of the more interesting essays in this chapter is `Utterly Shameless' by Letitia Baldrige. Its focus is on how "a rude person is often careless and unthinking but is usually too fast-moving to realise just how much she or he has offended others" whereas shameless people "often know full well when they're doing something mean-spirited or overly self-serving". Other distinctive essays are `Speak Easy' and `Please Don't Interrupt'.
Chapter eight, `They Also Serve', comprises five essays. The essay I found the most interesting is `Give Me the Civil Life' by Anne Taylor Flaming. It was about the decline of consideration and kindness people show those who service them on a daily basis, such as cashiers at grocery stores, waiters in restaurants, and so on. Other interesting essays are `A View from the Fridge' and `The Forgotten Groom'.
The final chapter, chapter nine comprises four essays written on the subject of `What Grace Does'. The essay that most impressed me from this chapter is `When Daddy Was King' by Frank Langella, which was about the relationship between a father and his daughter. I found it to be very touching, and I appreciated it even more as a daughter who never had a father.
Although the advice in this book is presented in a good-humoured manner that doesn't mean it shouldn't be taken seriously. These simple rules of etiquette are displayed in an amusing way that hopefully opens your eyes to your everyday, easily correctable mistakes, and allows you to have a few good laughs on the way.
The colours used in the book's design compliment each other and the font is easy to read. Every chapter page features an entertaining illustration by Chesley McLaren. The book's size is just right to fit inside a small bag or purse, so that it's easily transportable so you can take it anywhere you might find having a book useful. Each essay is about four pages long, told with an insightful sense of humour that makes the reader feel a bit guilty and sometimes even a little ashamed but also makes us laugh at ourselves whilst learning from our mistakes and how to deal with other people who have yet to discover this treasure of a book.
I highly recommend 'Town & Country's Social Graces' to anyone and everyone, not only for the clever advice, but for the humour as well.
Do you take this woman to be.....RING...RING...........2003-01-24
If you or someone you love has ever had their cell phone ring during a performance, church service, wedding, movie, etc....YOU or they need to read this book. It's not about stuffy manners. It's about consideration of your fellow man.
Whether it's not sending thank-you notes, cell phones ringing inapropriately, self-centered children interrupting or any of the subjects contained in this book, manners matter. No one is asking anyone to wear white gloves or to place a salt cellar at your dinner plate. It's about greasing the gears of civilized society.
One hilarious chapter deals with Politically Correct Americans making a HUGE ruckus over Europeans smoking. Throwing a massive tantrum over someone smoking in a French or German Restaurant will only identify you as a boorish American, and get you nothing more than a sideways glance and a shrug...while asking someone kindly if they would mind not smoking around you might just get the desired effect.
Another favorite chapter of mine was close to home, as I sometimes feel that the Tattoo Fairy has visited me in the middle of the night and inscribed "Tell me about your SEX LIFE" on my forehead. People just love to tell me their most intimate details which I do not seek and have not asked for. Evidentially, it is at epidemic stages and I am not alone in this observation.
This is a perfect length for a plane trip or a car trip, and you will nod in recognition and laugh out loud at some of these situations which require that we all brush up a bit on our manners.
Book Description
Charisma has come to be understood today as a special gift or talent that celebrities–artistic performers, athletes, movie stars, or political leaders–possess, a quality that makes their lives exemplary and transforms them into objects of universal appeal or attraction.
In Charisma, Philip Rieff explores the emergence and evolution of this mysterious and compelling concept within Judeo-Christian culture. Its first expression was in the idea of the covenant between God and the Israelites: Charisma–religious grace and authority–was transferred through divine inspiration to the Old Testament prophets; it was embodied by Jesus of Nazareth, the first true charismatic hero. Rieff shows how St. Paul transformed charisma into a form of social organization, how it was reworked by Martin Luther and by nineteenth-century Protestant theologians, and, finally, how Max Weber redefined charisma as a secular political concept. By emptying charisma of its religious meaning, Weber opened the door to the modern perception of it as little more than a form of celebrity, stripped of moral considerations.
Rieff rejects Weber’s definition, insisting that Weber misunderstood the relation between charisma and faith. He argues that without morality, the gift of grace becomes indistinguishable from the gift of evil, and it devolves into a license to destroy and kill in the name of faith or ideology. Offering brilliant interpretations of Kierkegaard, Weber, Kafka, Nietzsche, and Freud, Rieff shows how certain thinkers attacked the very possibility of faith and genuine charisma and helped prepare the way for the emergence of a therapeutic culture in which it is impossible to recognize that which is sacred. Rieff’s analysis of charisma is an analysis of the deepest level of crisis in our culture.
Customer Reviews:
the foundations of charisma and natural leadershp.......2007-07-27
The author details the foundations of charisima , indicating what true qualities establish people to have this trait and without these foundations , the charisima is not real. This is a very deep book, sometimes difficult to comprehand and follow and thats why I gave it three stars. The author writes like an intellectual, but I think he may be missing his mark to appeak to a large audience as a result.
An intriguing discussion.......2007-06-17
CHARISMA: THE GIFT OF GRACE, AND HOW IT HAS BEEN TAKEN AWAY FROM US tells of the idea of charisma from its earliest recognition by Old Testament prophets to the first charismatic, Jesus of Nazareth, and how charisma became part of the Christian church's evolution. Rieff argues for a different understanding of the relationship between charisma and faith, examining traditional and modern perceptions and paving the way for a dialogue between believers on the topic. An intriguing discussion, CHARISMA should prove of interest to any serious religious collection.
Diane C. Donovan
California Bookwatch
A Literary Theology Response to Postmoderns.......2007-04-08
"Charisma" and Philip Rieff are not for everyone or for most. (Read the prior review from G. Lehman about the difficulty of the writing style to see this.) If you have not read widely, especially in the Bible, and the postmodern precursors like Freud, Nietzsche, or Weber then "Charisma" will likely strike you as an academic bore.
Rieff accomplishes what seems to be a postmodern impossibility: thinking "intellectually" about the Bible and theology. By "intellectually" I mean that secular, academic, scientific perspective of conceptualization, rationalization, and articulation of ideas that is foundational in higher education and "elite" groups. It's what professors and public intellectuals do. Within that class of people, the Bible and theology are most typically viewed as intellectual deadends of proven unworth that appeal to sweaty snakehandlers under the tent on a hot August night. Rieff demonstrates that it is possible and interesting to think like an "intellectual" about Biblical and theological concepts in much the same way he did with his recent work, "Sacred Order," (another Rieff book I'd highly recommend and with the same caveats as observed with G. Lehman).
"Charisma" traces the meaning of the term, "charisma," from its original theological roots to its current postmodern corrupted state, explaining along the way how this corruption occurred (primarily through the writings of the postmodern precursors like Weber), but more importantly, the intellectual, moral, and cultural implications of this corruption. While we live in the postmodern Humpty Dumpty world where words mean whatever we chose them to mean, Rieff explicates "charisma" as a religiously derived term that springs from God and His Authority and then observes how the Humpty Dumpty changes in meaning that have occurred in the past 150 years have transformed the term into the postmodern foolishness of "charisma" as something that George Clooney, Madonna, and the latest American Idol possess. Please consider briefly the implication behind "charisma" as an element of fame versus "charisma" as the force of God's authority. If this is not an interesting or challenging comparison, you are not curious how this change in meaning developed, and you don't see any cultural or moral implications in the shift, then this book is not for you.
One appealing element of "Charisma" is that Philip Rieff has actually read the Bible and can pass the standard true-false test on its content. He continually demonstrates the bad misreadings of that text by writers like Weber and Freud who clearly read the Bible selectively (or more charitably with the map of misreading as described by Professor Bloom) in their attempts to discredit that theology and inflate their proposed substitutes. It's one thing to reject a perspective because you simply disagree with it, but it's another thing to reject it through misreading. As someone who was trained in the postmodern university, it is with considerable embarassment that I realize how much of the postmodern criticism of religion I accepted without reading the footnotes in that criticism. Freud makes a lot more sense when you uncritically accept his view of the Bible. If you know the Bible, Freud becomes just an another intellectual on the make trying to push his theory.
As I noted in my review of "Sacred Order" I've been a constant reader for over 40 years. I found "Sacred Order" to be one of the strongest, most interesting, and compelling books I've read. I see "Charisma" in the same light. This is a great book and worthy of reading, rereading, and reflection.
And, there awaits publication of a third volume in this series!
cloud of verbiage.......2007-04-05
If you think run-on sentences and page-long paragraphs are a necessary conduit to recondite wisdom, then you might want to wade into this morass of Latinated English prose. For myself, I think if the professor can't speak ordinary English I suspect that he's not thinking clearly. I wish I would have been warned that this is a project of two of his adoring pupils. And I wish I had been warned that couched in the ponderings are rationales, it seem to me, for disgust for the world as we know it, and reasons that Christianity almost has to be pivoted against Jewish religion. I myself have thought that many good persons have been working on this issue to a much more agreeable resolution.
Average customer rating:
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Human Development (9th Edition)
Grace J. Craig , and
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ASIN: 0130334413 |
Book Description
Drawing from many disciplines to provide an up-to-date presentation of the key questions, topics and controversies in life span development, this book takes a chronological approach to human development. It focuses on context and culture while illustrating that the status of human development is inextricably embedded in a study of complex and changing cultures. Maintaining an open-ended perspective throughout, the volume encompasses many different and opposing views and encourages readers to develop an informed point of view. This volume presents perspectives and research methods and examines approaches to understanding human development, heredity and environment. It reviews the physical, cognitive, and language development, as well as personality development and sociocultural development in infancy, toddlerhood, early and middle childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, middle adulthood and older adulthood. For those interested in human physical, cognitive and sociocultural development.
Customer Reviews:
Excellent resource.......2004-07-13
I used the eighth edition of this book for my graduate level course in human development. It is an excellent resource for anyone involved in child-related fields.
Book Description
Building a graceful marriage and raising creative, competent, contented children without legalism or manipulation.
Customer Reviews:
Great idea, truly, but how to implement it?.......2007-09-15
I liked the insight this book shared, but left wondering what I was supp
osed to do with this new outlook, ideas on how to approach situations differently. I got tired of reading about all the personal success the author reported in raising his kids. I don't need a book for that.
Like the approach but it ought to be fleshed out more with some less personal scenarios. Parenting is truly so personal.
Families Where Grace Is In Place.......2007-04-11
Terrific book on Christian family relationships and living. I highly recommend this book to any family who desires to truly love and build up one another in Christ.
This book changed my life.......2007-04-03
I recommend this book to everyone. I wish I had read this book while I was single and before I had children. It would have saved me years of trial and error. The author gives a fresh perspective on what God intended for families. This book just made so much sense to me. I had been feeling like quite a failure as a parent. Oh sure, I'd been enforcing all of the "Christian" child-rearing standards, but somehow there was a lack of closeness with my strong willed 11 year old daughter. In public she was the picture of a well behaved, well mannered child. At home there was a constant friction and power struggle with her. I knew what we were doing wasn't working but just didn't know what else to do. While reading Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse, The, repack: Recognizing and Escaping Spiritual Manipulation and False Spiritual Authority Within the Church I began to see that some of the legalistic standards imposed on me were in turn being imposed on her. I decided to purchase this book by Jeff VanVonderen to get more answers. That's exactly what I got! Our relationship is 100% improved. The burdens are being lifted. This book is also very helpful in the marriage category. It helped me to see some things and improve on that as well. If you want a whole new perspective on family I highly recommend this book.
Much needed for today's couples and families!.......2007-03-28
This book is a wonderful, refreshing and simple answer to what ails couples and families today. It is a very easy read, not to be confused with easy content. I fould that there are topics within that will hit close to home and might sting a little. But what was so comforting is that Jeff gives us answers. He explains the issues, the problems and the situations but does not dwell on them. Instead, he gets to the solutions and the answers. I found that it will take some re-training of ideals that I carried with me, but the work is so very worth it. When we do what is suggested in this book, our lives, our spouses lives and the lives of our families are changed expenentially.
Not just Psycho-babble.......2006-07-26
There is such a wide range in the quality of these sort of books that I am always a little cautiious. Sometimes counselors elevate mans wisdom over God's and forget to keep the Bible as the core of their analysis of the world. That is not the case here. While VanVonderen makes unique arguements he always keeps scripture at his core.
The central idea in this book is that we can choose to live "Graceful" lives- allowing God's love and grace to meet our inner most needs. Or, we can choose to live "Curseful" lives- seeking to have our inner needs met by others. Obviously, others can never meet our needs so we will always feel empty.
The primary aplication of this book is for the nuclear family. There are several chapters devoted to children which I found very helpful. They reinforced some parenting decisions that my wife and I have made in our child rearing. But, since our choices are not performance based they are often questioned so reading this book was a great encouragement and also helped us to refine our thinking and pointed out other areas where we were still being performance not heart driven in our parenting.
There is also space dedicated to how curseful vs. graceful living plays out in a marriage. These pages helped us (my wife and I read the book together) understand better changes we had made in the past that had greatly improved our once sinking relationship. But, it also challenged us to do better.
What I found most intreaging about the book is that the principles are universally true. The book is geared towards teh nuclear family but because the principles are true it can also be applied to the extended family. I was amazed, especially in the early chapters, at the insights that we gained about the mindset of our extended family. Just that was worth the price of the book.
Book Description
Friends broaden our children’s horizons, share their joys and secrets, and accompany them on their journeys into ever wider worlds. But friends can also gossip and betray, tease and exclude. Children can cause untold suffering, not only for their peers but for parents as well. In this wise and insightful book, psychologist Michael Thompson, Ph.D., and children’s book author Catherine O’Neill Grace, illuminate the crucial and often hidden role that friendship plays in the lives of children from birth through adolescence.
Drawing on fascinating new research as well as their own extensive experience in schools, Thompson and Grace demonstrate that children’s friendships begin early–in infancy–and run exceptionally deep in intensity and loyalty. As children grow, their friendships become more complex and layered but also more emotionally fraught, marked by both extraordinary intimacy and bewildering cruelty. As parents, we watch, and often live through vicariously, the tumult that our children experience as they encounter the “cool” crowd, shifting alliances, bullies, and disloyal best friends.
Best Friends, Worst Enemies brings to life the drama of childhood relationships, guiding parents to a deeper understanding of the motives and meanings of social behavior. Here you will find penetrating discussions of the difference between friendship and popularity, how boys and girls deal in unique ways with intimacy and commitment, whether all kids need a best friend, why cliques form and what you can do about them.
Filled with anecdotes that ring amazingly true to life, Best Friends, Worst Enemies probes the magic and the heartbreak that all children experience with their friends. Parents, teachers, counselors–indeed anyone who cares about children–will find this an eye-opening and wonderfully affirming book.
From the Hardcover edition.
Download Description
From the bestselling coauthor of Raising Cain comes a pathbreaking new book about the intricacies of children's friendships.
Customer Reviews:
Worst Enemies/ Best Friends Beacon Street Girls.......2004-09-15
Hi,My name is Taylor. I read Beacon Street Girls. It was a really great book. You never knew what to expect next. It was so interesting I could hardly put it down. It is a good book for any age girl. I felt like I was one of the Beacon Street Girls. I could see myself there. It is a perfect book for every girl. It has all the personalities of every girl, so anyone can relate to it. The book kept me guessing throughout the entire story. Even when I put it down I kept wondering what was going to happen next. I would highly recommend this book to any girl of any age. I know you will enjoy this and be glad you read it. I hope you will be as excited as I to read the next book and tell your friends.
Not as interesting as I'd hoped.......2002-09-17
I guess I was expecting something more in-depth and less instructional. I am sure this is a fine book for a parent who isn't clued into how some kids are popular and some kids have no friends at all, but I was looking for a more psychological perspective.
I did find the short sections about infants and toddlers very interesting. I think there should have been less emphasis on popularity and what it means to children. The section about people acting a certain way because of a group mentality rather than personal morals captured my attention.
This book is important........2002-05-03
Alice Miller (author of The Drama of the Gifted Child and Breaking Down the Walls of Silence) has long emphasized that if we are serious about solving society's problems, we must focus on how we treat children --- as individual families and as a cultural. This book is an excellent contribution toward that end.
From thought-provoking observations to practical suggestions about solutions, Best Friends, Worst Enemies is an effective education about social problems that begin in childhood, but do not end in childhood. One point the authors make that interests me greatly is that when one child is being bullied by others, the majority of children witnessing the abuse will either do nothing to intervene or they will join in with the bullying. If you think that is not a reflection of the society in which we live, think again.
As a psychotherapist and author (Embracing Fear, HarperSanFrancisco) who emphasizes personal responsibility and facing fears head on, I hope that more than just parents and educators will read this book. I think there is something here for us all to think about --- no, to do something about.
Children's social lives.......2002-03-13
Outatanding book! It has valuable information for adults concerning what our kids social lives are like and how to help them when there is a problem. Children can be so cruel. The book sheds light on a world we as adults don't really understand. This book is well written and easy to read. I highly recommend it!
Shows how parents can understand and help children socially.......2002-02-19
After watching a feature documentary on the power of social relationships to shape a child's life into adulthood, I was already interested in learning more. This book filled the bill, especially the sections which revealed how children use power (and even bullying) to both include some children and exclude others. I think most of us remember the playground bullies but what this book did was show how parents can help to change bullying behavior, give their children skills to handle bullies and lessen the damaging effects of their behavior.
This book focuses on far more than bullies and those who purchase it will find it filled with rich insights into the social world of children and how they view their friendships and connections with other children.
Average customer rating:
- Amazing Grace
- Amazing Grace
- Amazing Grace
- What a teaching tool!!!
- You Can Do Anything
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Amazing Grace (Reading Rainbow Book)
Mary Hoffman
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Customer Reviews:
Amazing Grace.......2007-02-05
I got the book as a gift for my grand daughter who likes to draw. The vivid colors and expressions on the characters faces should keep her interested for a while. The story line is an added bonus.
Amazing Grace.......2005-11-09
I liked this story because Grace can be Peter Pan if she put her mind to it. My favorite part is after the ballet. I would recommend this book to a friend because its about your imaginery. The book is amazing.
By: S.J.
Los Angeles
Age 5
Amazing Grace.......2005-10-17
This is a great story with a great message. It tells children there are no limits to what they can be. It tells children not to be deterred by sterotypes or opinions. You can be anything you set your mind to. I bought copies for both my son and my niece.
What a teaching tool!!!.......2004-11-30
Do you need a book that confronts racism, appreciates theater, and shatters stereotypes on a primary level? If so, Amazing Grace, by Mary Hoffman, is the book for you. Not only does this book cover the above topics, but is also highlights on key items for younger readers, such as reading about individual achievements and moral dilemmas.
Grace, a first grade African American female, has an imagination with no boundaries. Grace loves to act out stories that she is told. At school, Grace's heart runs with excitement when her teacher announces that the class is going to do the play Peter Pan. Everyone wants to be Peter Pan, which highlights the enthusiasm for theater among these students. However, as Grace wants to be Peter Pan, her classmates tell her first that she can't because she is not a male. The second reason her classmates say is that she can't be Peter Pan is because she is black. Here lies the racism in this book.
The teacher allows each student to take home lines and memorize them to try out for roles. The best would get Peter Pan. In the mean time, Grace's grandmother takes her to a Romeo and Juliet ballet that features a black Juliet. This inspires Grace to go home and learn those lines as best as she can so that she will be the best one in the class. When it is time to try out, Grace is by far the best Peter Pan and the class votes to let her fill this role. This is where the shattering of stereotypes comes into play.
Past the social issues, Amazing Grace also fulfills the requirements that the Temple textbook states are good children's literature. First, children's literature must speak to the child. Children, especially that would read Amazing Grace, are extremely egocentric. Therefore, they want to read about the potential for individual achievement. Any child that is repressed for any reason could identify with Grace. There are a lot of things that Peter Pan was not, not just simply black. African American students could truly identify with Grace, having to deal with their differences that are spawned by their skin color and culture.
The last noticeable characteristic of good children's literature apparent in Amazing Grace is the presence of in depth thought, especially on morals. This book spawns thought on all the social issues mentioned above. This book would most certainly cause students to re- evaluate their thoughts and stances on racism, stereotypes, and maybe even theater. So many times, students think that what their parents believe is what they have to believe. However, educating students can help not only in letting them make their own decisions, but also educating their parents as well.
Finally, this book is an excellent book for teachers because there are many activities that can be done to accompany the reading. Perhaps this would be a great book to lead into their own class play. Another idea is to place this in a unit on racism and segregation in the upper elementary levels. Also, a teacher could do dress up day and the students could be whatever they want to be. All stereotypes are shattered for the day and each student can be free to be who they are. Amazing Grace may be one of the most influential books that I have ever read on racism and the way that Grace and her family handle this issue is admirable.
You Can Do Anything.......2002-12-16
This story is about a girl that pretends to play the parts of all kinds of different people and one day thiers a play and she wants to play the part of Peter Pan and some kids tell er she can't then she goes home. Later on they her parents tell her she can do anything she wants as long as she puts her mind to it, and she did.
Book Description
Theorists of "secularization" for two centuries have been saying that religion must inevitably decline in the modern world. But much of the world today is as religious as ever. This volume challenges the belief that the modern world is increasingly secular, showing instead that modernization more often strengthens religion. Seven expert social observers examine several regions and several religions--Catholic and Protestant Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, Islam--and explore the resurgence of religion in world affairs.
Customer Reviews:
Exceptional.......2004-07-08
Berger is brilliant, funny and wise - an academic that thinks like a real person. His writing is insightful, flows with ease and engages the reader with mini-revelations. Though he writes only the first chapter, a few others are equally enthralling, especially those on Pope John Paul II's philosophy and that concerning Islam. Unfortunately a few others belong only to sociologists - lists, speculation and esoteric social theories, which often sound as though from an ivory tower on another planet, where social theorists debate whether their world is made all of one thing or all of another. In the John Paul chapter we find the Pope concretely defeating postmodern silliness in its rejection of universality. The chapter on Islam teaches much and provides reasoned, balanced direction toward Islamic change for the better, though some of that is perhaps a bit idyllic when it comes to fundamentalist Islam as one may as well preach peace to a charging grizzly.
Berger's premise is this: To assume we are living in a secular world is wrong. The world today "is as furiously religious as it ever was, and in some places more than ever". Though modernity has secularizing effects it has provoked powerful movements of counter-secularization. Which harkens back to the Brooks Adams 1896 classic, "The Law Of Civilization And Decay". In it Adams notes with no one left to defeat, ideas from round the Empire flooded Rome causing a near universal dis-ease among its population. Their response? Extreme religious eagerness, the sprouting of new mystery religions of which Christianity was but one of hundreds. Our upsurge today is primarily among conservative, traditionalist orthodox movements of Islam and in the Christian world among Pentecostals and other Evangelicals at the expense of Catholicism and mainline Protestantism like Lutheran, Episcopalian and Methodists.
Why has modernity had this affect? Berger is clear, because modernity has removed all the old certainties and most people find it impossible to live with uncertainty. Any movement that "promises to provide or renew certainty has a ready market". Those "dripping with supernaturalism have widely succeeded".
Berger does not note the 60's source of modern Liberal promoters of their paradox that "the truth is there is no truth", but he does say while thin on the ground in numbers they wield excess influence by their control of the media and university (of which he is a member - Boston U). This is the "culture elite" Berger notes that some fraction of the movements resent and battle in America's Culture Wars - and not necessarily for religious reasons. Without mention of lacking higher education among the masses, Berger clarifies the chasm between secular (of comparatively what little there is) and non-secular, "The religious impulse, the quest for meaning that transcends the restricted space of empirical existence in this world, has been a perennial feature of humanity. It would require something close to a mutation of the species to extinguish this impulse for good... The critique of secularity common to all the resurgent movements is that human existence bereft of transcendence is an impoverished and finally untenable condition." Like it or not religion, mysticism, mythology have been and will remain part of humans. Finding a path to balance in the face of warring zealotry - which was of such concern to The Founders - is a subject of concern in this extraordinary book.
Pseudo or Real Desecularization?.......2003-09-04
Second submittal (revised)
Sociologist Peter L. Berger's 1974 book Pyramids of Sacrifice: Political Ethics and Social Change foresaw what we now call "globalization." His 1983 book with sociologist Brigitte Berger The War Over The Family anticipated what has been dubbed as the "cultural wars." And his 1966 classic The Social Construction of Reality was way ahead of its time with regard to what is currently termed "postmodernism." But Berger admits in The Desecularization of the World: Resurgent Religion and World Politics (1999) that he was mistaken in some of his other earlier works that modernization inevitably leads to a decline in religion. As Berger states: "To say the least, the relation between religion and modernity is rather complicated." The Desecularization of the World was written two years before 9-11. One can only guess that Berger was not as surprised as most at such a world-changing event, ostensibly motivated by religious fundamentalism, but less apparently orchestrated by failed secular elites from a politically destabilizing Saudi Arabia. As Berger has written elsewhere: "upsurges of religion" in the modern era are, in most cases, politicized movements "that use religion as a convenient legitimation for political agendas based on non-religious interests" in contrast with "movements genuinely inspired by religion." (Berger, National Interest, Winter 1996-97:3). This more certainly was the case in the recent past Balkan Wars in the Yugoslav states (see V. Perica, Balkan Idols, Oxford, 2002). Berger points out that we have been misled to believe that modernization resulted in secularization mainly because the elite cultural carriers of secularization have been a minority of highly visible academics who have myopically led everyone to believe this is the case.
But beyond the headline events, religion, especially "fundamentalist" religion is growing in every modernizing country, with the exception of already-modernized Europe. Berger has assembled some of the most eminent observers to report on this upsurge.
George Weigel, scholar and official biographer of Pope John Paul II, provides a Catholic perspective on the phenomenon. Citing Pope John Paul II, Weigel perhaps presaged 9-11 and the ensuing wars in Afghanistan and Iraq with the following question: "Is pre-emptive military action legitimate against rogue regimes threatening the use of weapons of mass destruction? How is the just-war tradition, which was designed to regulate international public life in a world of sovereign states, to address the serious moral problems for world politics posed by non-state actors - ranging from financial institutions to terrorist organizations - today?"
Sociologist David Martin, sociologist emeritus at the London School of Economics, provides a masterful overview of the upsurge of "evangelical" Christian religion mainly in Africa and South America and its political implications. Martin reports that the political stance of evangelical Christians is often erroneously viewed by outsiders with suspicion as similar to radical Islam or some violent cult. Rather, Martin reports that the most potent contribution of evangelical movements is their creation of voluntary associations that tend to foster democracy rather than totalitarianism or attempts at creating a "Christian society."
Jonathan Sacks, Chief Rabbi of Britain, observes that history is the tale of vacillating attempts by Jews to define themselves as either a people or a religion. Sacks states that historically Jews defined themselves as the "people of God," but more recently have defined themselves as the "people hated by Gentiles." Many Jews have abandoned their religious roots and embraced secularism to solve their identity conflict and end persecution. But that hasn't diminished the attempts by many neighboring nations to exterminate the nation of Israel.
British sociologist Grace Davie provides a well-written account of how Europe is an exception to these trends, as, unlike the rest of the world, religion has declined precipitously. Perhaps Davie doesn't emphasize enough that this might be the consequence of the sponsorship of Christian religion by many European states. Also, Davie is curiously silent about the influx of Muslims into Europe and the likelihood that Islamic populations may soon dominate some large cities such as Rotterdam, Netherlands. Davie doesn't tell us if the demographic decline of indigenous Europeans is in any way related to secularization.
Tu Weiming, a history professor at Harvard University, reports on the resurgence of Christianity, Buddhism, and Confucianism following the collapse of worldwide communism. Interestingly, Weiming states that higher education in China has been heavily and positively influenced by Chinese-Christian universities, unlike higher education in the West which is nearly all secularized. Weiming doesn't tell us if China may be motivated by religion to resist modernization or will religion form the impetus to some form of capitalism?
Abdullah An-Na'im, a law professor at Emory University, provides an overview of political Islam and international affairs up to 1999. An-Na'im states that the idea that there is an unfolding "clash of religious civilizations" between the West and Islam is a self-fulfilling prophecy and is not inevitable. But An-Na'im is not a sociologist and doesn't tell us how Muslims can embrace modernization without leaving the "closed circle" of the family and kinship and the "sacred canopy" of the mosque in order to work in the impersonal corporations and bureaucracies of modern societies.
The assumption of most people is that modernization is good and thus religion is backward because it impedes modernization. But, as the world is painfully coming to understand, modernization must also come to recognize and respect socially sacred shelters of meaning. Moreover, those societies that have historically become test cases for pure secularization, such as the former U.S.S.R., Mao's China, and Pol Pot's Cambodia, have made present-day religious conflicts look mild compared to the murdering of millions for the sake of creating a secular rational utopia. For those who want to get a handle on these issues, this is an outstanding overview that neither blindly embraces religion or modernization. Other books I have found of related interest are Steve Bruce, Politics and Religion (2003), Vjekoslav Perica, Balkan Idols: Religion and Nationalism in Yugoslavia (2002) and Douglas Johnston, Faith-Based Diplomacy: Trumping Realpolitik (2003).
A Prophetic Book Prior to 9-11.......2003-08-24
Sociologist Peter L. Berger's 1974 book Pyramids of Sacrifice: Political Ethics and Social Change foresaw what we now call "globalization." His 1983 book with sociologist Brigitte Berger The War Over The Family anticipated what has been dubbed as the "cultural wars." And his 1966 classic The Social Construction of Reality was way ahead of its time with regard to what is currently termed "postmodernism." But Berger admits in The Desecularization of the World: Resurgent Religion and World Politics (1999) that he was mistaken in some of his other earlier works that modernization inevitably leads to a decline in religion. As Berger states: "To say the least, the relation between religion and modernity is rather complicated." Nonetheless, The Desecularization of the World was written two years before 9-11. One can only guess that Berger was not as surprised as most at such a world-changing event, ostensibly motivated by religious fundamentalism but less apparently orchestrated by failed secular elites from a politically destabilizing Saudi Arabia. As Berger has written elsewhere: "upsurges of religion" in the modern era are, in most cases, politicized movements "that use religion as a convenient legitimation for political agendas based on non-religious interests" in contrast with "movements genuinely inspired by religion." (Berger, National Interest, Winter 1996-97:3). This more certainly was the case in the recent past Balkan Wars in the Yugoslav states (see V. Perica, Balkan Idols, Oxford, 2002). Berger points out that we have been misled to believe that modernization resulted in secularization mainly because the elite cultural carriers of secularization have been a minority of highly visible academics who have myopically led everyone to believe this was the case. But beyond the headline events, religion, especially "fundamentalist" religion is rapidly growing in every modernizing country, with the exception of already-modernized Europe. Berger has assembled some of the most eminent observers to report on this upsurge.
George Weigel, scholar and official biographer of Pope John Paul II, provides a Catholic perspective on the phenomenon. Citing Pope John Paul II, Weigel perhaps presaged 9-11 and the ensuing wars in Afghanistan and Iraq with the following question: "Is pre-emptive military action legitimate against rogue regimes threatening the use of weapons of mass destruction? How is the just-war tradition, which was designed to regulate international public life in a world of sovereign states, to address the serious moral problems for world politics posed by non-state actors - ranging from financial institutions to terrorist organizations - today?"
Sociologist David Martin, sociologist emeritus at the London School of Economics, provides a masterful overview of the upsurge of "evangelical" Christian religion mainly in Africa and South America and its political implications. Martin reports that the political stance of evangelical Christians is often erroneously viewed by outsiders with suspicion as similar to radical Islam or some violent cult. Rather, Martin reports that the most potent contribution of evangelical movements is their creation of voluntary associations that tend to foster democracy rather than totalitarianism or attempts at creating a "Christian society."
Jonathan Sacks, Chief Rabbi of Britain, observes that history is the tale of vacillating attempts by Jews to define themselves as either a people or a religion. Sacks states that historically Jews defined themselves as the "people of God," but more recently have defined themselves as the "people hated by Gentiles." Many Jews have abandoned their religious roots and embraced secularism to solve their identity conflict and end persecution. But that hasn't diminished the attempts by many neighboring nations to exterminate the nation of Israel.
British sociologist Grave Davie provides a well-written account of how Europe is an exception to these trends, as, unlike the rest of the world, religion has declined precipitously. Perhaps Davie doesn't emphasize enough that this might be the consequence of the sponsorship of Christian religion by many European states. Also, Davie is curiously silent about the influx of Muslims into Europe and the likelihood that Islamic populations may soon dominate some large cities such as Rotterdam, Netherlands. Davies doesn't tell us if the demographic decline of indigenous Europeans is in any way related to secularization.
Tu Weiming, a history professor at Harvard University, reports on the resurgence of Christianity, Buddhism, and Confucianism following the collapse of worldwide communism. Interestingly, Weiming states that higher education in China has been heavily and positively influenced by Chinese-Christian universities, unlike higher education in the West which is nearly all secularized. Weiming doesn't tell us if China may be motivated by religion to resist modernization or will religion form the impetus to some form of capitalism?
Abdullah An-Na'im, a law professor at Emory University, provides an overview of political Islam and international affairs up to 1999. An-Na'im states that the idea that there is an unfolding "clash of religious civilizations" between the West and Islam is a self-fulfilling prophecy and is not inevitable. But An-Na'im is not a sociologist and doesn't tell us how Muslims can embrace modernization without leaving the "closed circle" of the family and kinship and the "sacred canopy" of the mosque in order to work in the impersonal and even nihilistic corporations and bureaucracies of modern societies.
The assumption of most people is that modernization is good and thus religion is backward because it impedes modernization. But, as the world is painfully coming to understand, religion must change as well if nations are to modernize. For those who want to get a handle on these issues, this is an outstanding overview that neither blindly embraces or rejects religion or modernization.
Book Description
Here are all of Grace Paley's classic stories collected in one volume. Her quirky, boisterous characters and rich use of language have won her readers' hearts and secured her place as one of America's most accomplished writers of short fiction.
Customer Reviews:
Doubted it but ended up liking it.......2006-01-11
Someone suggested I read this collection and at first I doubted I would like it, I skimmed through it and it didn't grab me but since I promised the person I would read it, I finally did. I couldn't have been more wrong about this collection- it's very well written and interesting. The subject matter of the stories might not be for everyone but I really was surprised to see how wrong I was and definitely should have given this an earlier chance. Paley's writing is clear and takes you through even parts where you might be confused. It is unusual to what I usually read but it grew on me and now I want to read more of Grace Paley's work. Her stories definitely have a period feel that might challenge certain readers but if you give it a chance, you just might enjoy it as I did.
Living in the neighborhood.......2003-12-09
The characters in these stories are consistent throughout the book. Reading the stories was like getting acquainted with a community of people. I lost interest in some stories, while others contained gems of wisdom and phrases that stopped me in my tracks.
In a story called, "A Conversation With My Father" Paley writes:
""I would like you to write a simple story just once more," he says, "the kind Maupassant wrote, or Chekhov, the kind you used to write. Just recognizable people and then write down what happened to them next."
I say, "Yes, why not? That's possible." I want to please him, though I don't remember writing that way. I would like to try to tell such a story, if he means the kind that begins:'There was a woman..." followed by plot, the absolute line between two points which I've always despised. not for literary reasons, but because it takes all hope away. Everyone, real or invented, deserves the open destiny of life."
People say short stories are dying..........2001-05-21
This collection of short fiction demonstrates just how horrible that would be. Grace Paley's work is amazing in its lyrical sound - at some moments sparse, at others extremely detailed, and always poignant. Stories about single mothers, about women visiting elderly parents in odd nursing homes, about families in general, and how the world works (and worked). It is hard to find a good short story writer... Somewhere between a novel (overly stuffed with words) and a poem (too highly styled and formatted to say what it really wants to say) a short story, when good, can come closest to literary perfection - you can say all that you want to say, but only that. Grace Paley's stories come close to that perfection. She is one of the most underappreciated great authors out there.
Ooh, what delicious writing this is.......2000-10-14
Grace Paley has that rarest of gifts: a voice all her own. Funny, tough, and compassionate, this voice mirrors her characters, some of whom (especially the eponymous Faith) are people you wish you knew, or already do. At every turn, her characters avoid stereotype, something most self-professed "political" and "feminist" writers fail to do. Three volumes of stories are collected here; the first volume, I think, is the richest. Here Paley is content to represent the hilarious, yet tragic, travails of her characters. In the later volumes, aside from being more experimental in form, she tackles overtly political themes. But the voice never fails her, and even the most dogmatic, contrived story is lifted above the ordinary. Paley never loses her compassion for mankind. At the end of her career, this was her abiding them: when faced with cynicism or compassion, she always extended the latter to her fellow human beings. These are great, tough stories, worthy of reading several times over. Please buy this collection and spread the word. Paley is that dying breed -- an American original.
One of America's most underrated writers.......2000-06-16
ENORMOUS CHANGES AT THE LAST MINUTE is a perfect collection of perfect stories. It's too bad the reader from Marietta, GA spews forth such ignorant bile about such a wonderful writer.
Book Description
Sam Margulies, Ph.D., J.D., one of the most experienced mediators in the country, shares his experience to help men make this unpleasant process as quick and amicable as possible. His suggestions on how to manage this turbulent period will significantly minimize the effects of divorce on the separating couple and on any children in the relationship. Taking into consideration custody issues, and giving specific financial and legal advice, this book will inform men about how to choose a lawyer, how to deal with a pre-nup,and when not to go to trial. Dr. Margulies explores all the elements that make for a good, fair divorce, as well as the importance of timing and the decision to get counseling. He also explains how to avoid a legal mess, how to predict the long-term implications of alimony and child support, how to divide up property, and how to negotiate the final agreement. In A Man's Guide to a Civilized Divorce, Dr. Margulies helps men avoid the treacherous waters of divorce and illustrates how, with the right advice, one can actually come through the process in pretty good shape.
Customer Reviews:
Single best book on Divorce.......2007-05-23
This book is awesome--should be included with any predivorce meetinf with an atty. Not just for men!!
Get this book and seriously consider following its advice.......2007-01-04
This book has a lot of good insights into the divorce process. More than anything else I got out of it was the idea that the relationship is not going to end. So working through the process with that in mind has really helped me get ready to go forward.
I strongly recommend this book for anyone struggling to find an even keel as you head into the rough seas of divorce.
Made a difference.......2006-09-29
My divorce was handled via mediation and ended up being (relatively) civilized (though still painful), in part because of the advice in this book. As the commenter from Boston noted it does take two rationale people to make this occur, and I was fortunate to be in that situation. But in many ways it was because of this guide that I approached the situation more rationally and in the end that helped make a difference.
In a better world maybe..........2005-08-11
This book assumes you do not have a spouse who wants nothing other than to cut off your balls and take everything you've got and/or that she is willing to act with some degree of rationality. Well...guess what. That is simply not the case all the time. Maybe if I had the sense to start my divorce several years earlier, it would have been possible to utilize the very sensible advice in this book. Unfortunately, this advice was of no practical benefit in my situation and no amount of understanding or common sense on my part would have changed the situation.
Good luck to anyone in this situation. I screwed myself in a number of ways by thinking my soon to be ex-spouse would react rationally and favorably if I only acted sensibly and fairly.
Inaccurate title.......2005-02-02
The title of this book should be: "The wealthy, middle-aged man's..." The book has good information, but none of the men in any of the examples in this book make less than $100,000/yr, and all of the advice is geared towards men in their late 40's earning 100K+.
[...]
Example: when advising "us" on the costs expected in setting up a new two-bedroom household, the author claims that it could cost $10-15,000 if we play it safe. In other words, 1/4 of my annual income. I must be a financial genius because somehow I was able to do it for about 1,200.
About me: 28, 2 kids, full-time university employeed computer, programming and design professional. (Haven't had time to get that JD, MD or PhD... yet). I should have known this wasn't the book for me when I read on page one that a 28 yr old guy divorcing 3 years into a marriage could more- or- less write it off without financial difficulty. Uh huh.
That said, you can glean the kernel of the book no matter what: wanting the best for your wife's finances and creating a positive working relationship with her are the two best things a man can to do to ensure that, a) your children are happy, and feel safe, b) you don't waste a lot of money on legal fees, and c) you are "civil".
Books:
- Animal, Vegetable, Miracle: A Year of Food Life
- Apple Pro Training Series: Encyclopedia of Visual Effects (Apple Pro Training)
- Be Prepared for the AP Calculus Exam
- Bruce Davidson: East 100th Street
- Busting Loose From the Money Game: Mind-Blowing Strategies for Changing the Rules of a Game You Can't Win
- California Wine Country: A Sunset Field Guide (Sunset Field Guides)
- Computer Accounting with Peachtree Complete 2006, Release 13.0 with Student CD-ROM
- Copper Plate Photogravure: Demystifying the Process
- Creating Photomontages with Photoshop: A Designer's Notebook (Designers Notebook)
- Deke McClelland's Look & Learn Photoshop 6
Books Index
Books Home
Recommended Books
- An American Life: The Autobiography
- The Tao of Nutrition
- The $64 Tomato: How One Man Nearly Lost his Sanity, Spent a Fortune, and Endured an Existential Cris
- Success With Rhododendrons and Azaleas, Revised Edition
- The Art of the Comic Book: An Aesthetic History
- Statistics for the Life Sciences
- The Firecracker Boys
- Aspen & Central Colorado Trails, A Hiking Guide
- Romantic Rise of a Great American
- Burny's Journeys: Lessons and Confessions of an Aging Hipster
Savage Inequalities: Children in America's Schools
The Shame of the Nation: The Restoration of Apartheid Schooling in America
Rachel and Her Children: Homeless Families in America
There Are No Children Here: The Story of Two Boys Growing Up in The Other America
Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America
