Average customer rating:
- Infidelity around the World
- EXCELLENT book!
- Unique & humorous perspective on cultural differences
- A guide for the perplexed?
- Shrinking things down to size...
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Lust in Translation: The Rules of Infidelity from Tokyo to Tennessee
Pamela Druckerman
Manufacturer: Penguin Press HC, The
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ASIN: 1594201145
Release Date: 2007-04-19 |
Book Description
An irreverent and hilarious journey around the world to examine how and why people cheat on their spouses; this global look at infidelity reveals that Americans are uniquely mixed up about being faithful.
It's an adulterous world out there. Russian husbands and wives don't believe that beach-resort flings violate their marital vows. Japanese businessmen, armed with the aphorism "If you pay, it's not cheating," flock to sex clubs where the extramarital services on offer include "getting oral sex without showering first." South Africans may be the masters of creative accounting: Pollsters there had to create separate categories for men who cheat, and men who only cheat while drunk.
In America, however, there is never a free pass when it comes to infidelity. According to our national moral compass, cheating is abominable no matter what the circumstances. But do we actually behave differently than everyone else? Pamela Druckerman, a former foreign correspondent for The Wall Street Journal, decided to delve into this incredibly taboo topic. She interviews people all over the world, from retirees in South Florida to Muslim polygamists in Indonesia; from Hasidic Jews in Brooklyn to the men who keep their mistresses in a "concubine village" outside Hong Kong.
Druckerman talks to psychologists, sex researchers, marriage counselors, and most of all, cheaters and the people they've cheated on, and concludes that Americans are the least adept at having affairs, have the most trouble enjoying them, and suffer the most in their aftermath.
Lust in Translation is a voyeuristic, statistics-packed, sometimes shocking, often hysterical, worldwide glimpse into the endlessly intriguing world of extramarital sex. It may be politically incorrect to say so, but who knew infidelity could be this fascinating?
Customer Reviews:
Infidelity around the World.......2007-09-01
In March or April, Lust in Translation received a glamorous review in The Economist and sparked my interest. It's an informative book about the cultural aspects of affairs... Pamela Druckerman somehow researches this thorny subject and presents rare insights into cheating in the US, France, Russia, Japan, Indonesia, China and South Africa.
Having had exposure to the cultures in the USA, France and Russia, I did not find the chapters about these three countries surprising. In a way, the book just confirmed what I already knew or suspected. In contrast, what goes on (or doesn't go on) in a Japanese bedroom was completely novel to me.
I would not necessarily recommend this book to an American cheated or cheating spouse. It is neither a self-help guide to appeal to the former nor a manual on how to have affairs to satisfy the latter. Nevertheless, if you are looking for an easy, interesting read and want to be culturally informed about the subject, this book is one of a kind. Just be prepared for your spouse's raised eyebrows and have an answer to the question "Why on Earth are you reading THIS book?"
EXCELLENT book!.......2007-07-24
As an American who lived in Japan for several years, I believe that Ms. Druckerman's observations of the culture surrounding marriage, courtship, and extra-marital affairs in Japan are very accurate. I also enjoyed reading the rest of the book, and found it to be well-researched, well-analyzed, and well-written. This book does not aim to be a self-help book; rather, it is more of a sociological perspective on a universal issue. The book's description of cultural differences and personal perspectives regarding infidelity are fascinating. Overall, the book is interesting and enjoyable to read, and I highly recommend it.
Unique & humorous perspective on cultural differences.......2007-06-30
I decided to buy a copy of "Lust in Translation" by Pamela Druckerman because way back when (mid 1980s), Pamela and I were US House of Representatives pages together. Other than an occasional email contact, I had not directly heard much from Pamela. I had read several of her Wall Street Journal articles over the years.
As someone who thoroughly enjoys reading about other cultures and people, this book fit my occasional non-fiction reading habits. I wasn't looking for anything "heavy" - as in, full of facts, figures, dates, or history. And, I certainly wanted to stay away from anything that seemed academic or dry.
It's fair to say that if you're looking for relatively creative non-fiction spanning several cultures that are not frequently bunched together or compared (including Hasidic Jews, French, and Chinese), you'll find it hard to put down this book.
In my opinion, Druckerman's writing style mirrors what you would expect from a former Wall Street Journal reporter. She mixes interviews, statistics, and commentary in a nearly seamless manner. In a sense, it's a collection of long articles - each relating to a different culture's practices and perspectives relating to infidelity.
There are many funny tidbits (using words you usually don't see in serious non-fiction) about how each culture covered refers to affairs in their language - often using slang terms. I laughed out loud a few times.
To me, the best contribution of the book is comparing the stereotypes regarding infidelity for each culture to how it is currently viewed within the culture. I was left surprised that anyone would share some of the details described in the book - even on an anonymous basis.
My overall conclusion is that this book falls into the category of "Truth is stranger than fiction." The way Druckerman handles this topic, it's possibly more funny than fiction, too.
A guide for the perplexed?.......2007-06-12
"Thinking of the unthinkable" -- be it a nuclear disaster or personal tragedy -- is never an easy lot. Exploring, unearthing and writing publically about the "unthinkable" is even more uncomfortable. Infidelity is certainly an issue belonging to the "unthinkable" in our contemporary environment, yet this author managed to explore it in a style that is witty, smart, candid and lucid. Her sense of humor and delicate, tactfull hand helps make reading a delightful and enriching experience, avoiding pitfalls that could cause embarrassment to the reader ( and the writer, of course.)
As one whose work takes him across the glob, I recognized the ring of authentnicity in the chapters dealing with societies that I know. Druckerman's observations deciphered for me some of the behavioral characteristics that I witnessed but did not fathom in societies that I visited. A great reading for anyone who travels the world -- perhaps a must reading for international corporation staff or UN-type personnel. It is a "guide for the perplexed"-cum-travel guide for the uncharted roads of infidelity.
Shrinking things down to size..........2007-05-29
As a psychotherapist who has himself been through an adulterated divorce, I must say that this book shares a clear perspective on cheating which is not only useful for professional therapists dealing with issues of infidelity, it is at once relevant and useful for my clients as well. Taking the approach from a non-religious and non-moral majority stance allows this painful yet fascinating topic to be unpacked in a way that gives us a sense that what is hapenning in these relationships, OUR relationships, is a quiet storm crying out for love and the absence of pain. We must grow together in relationships with communication as our navigational system, rather than rely on satisfying our emotional holes with sexual silly putty. This book should be on every therapists shelf and anyone in a relationship worth saving.
Amazon.com
At first blush, the subtitle of intrepid traveler Eric Hansen's floral account might seem, well, hyperbolic. After taking this whirlwind tour of the hidden world of rare orchid collectors, the reader will find the words well chosen. Hansen invites us into a strange demimonde of intrigue and desire, at the center of which is the orchid, that shadowy and somewhat sinister parasitic oddball of the plant kingdom. Orchid raising and trading is big business. Worldwide, the retail economy in orchids adds up to some $9 billion; in the United States, wholesalers ship nearly 8.5 million plants a year, while in Holland a single nursery produces 18 million. "Several million people worldwide now grow orchids," the author notes, "and this botanical craze has already eclipsed both the nineteenth-century frenzy for orchids as well as the tulip madness that gripped the Netherlands in the seventeenth century."
With such willing customers, it's no wonder that a thriving black market now exists. To serve it, orchids are taken illegally from sensitive ecological areas in places like Thailand, Borneo, and darkest Minnesota. In scenes reminiscent of Susan Orlean's The Orchid Thief, Hansen follows the trail of orchid smugglers, pursuing money and plants in a whodunit tale that involves botanical gardens, scholars, scientists, ordinary enthusiasts, and "plant cops"--international eco-police whose job it is to stop the traffic in rare and often endangered plants. Those vigilantes have their work cut out for them, Hansen writes, especially because some of the current laws may be misguided, causing more harm than good and equating honest breeders with botanical desperadoes. The laws are bound to fail in any event, he suggests, if only because the plant trade, like that of the drug trade, is simply too big to curtail.
Orchid enthusiasts and admirers of good journalism alike will find plenty of interest in Hansen's vivid, richly anecdotal investigation. --Gregory McNamee
Book Description
A seductive journey into the obsessive, outrageous, and mesmerizing world of orchids.
From the steaming jungles of Borneo to the hallowed hallways of Kew Gardens, from the clandestine orchid nurseries of Europe to the peat bogs of northern Minnesota, here are luscious, sexy flowers, orchid smugglers, fist-fighting botanists, moths with twelve-inch-long tongues, and government officials who raid orchid nurseries with attack dogs and automatic weapons. Strange tales of insect pollinator fidelity, the orchid ice cream makers of eastern Turkey, and man-crushing killer orchids weighing half a ton are blended with stories about a wide range of gentle people whose passion in life is the creation of scented, fragile flowers.
Eric Hansen spent seven years exploring the far corners of the earth -- marveling at flowers of uncommon beauty, studying the history of the orchid trade, and grappling with the vicious, bizarre, and petty world of plant politics that sometimes makes it impossible to protect endangered species. Hansen brings to life the colorful flowers and the even more colorful people who are attracted to them, as he illuminates a funny, weird, and poignant world of horticultural passion and pathos.
Customer Reviews:
Salacious and trivial.......2007-09-28
There's probably a good book about orchids and the recondite subject of international orchid policy in "Orchid Fever." In fact, I'm sure of it. Unfortunately, Eric Hansen spoils his effort with a lubricious, snarky brew of exaggerations, sneers, dubious anecdotes and invented suggestions.
One example can stand for a multitude of sins. Hansen attends a three-day conference and trade show of orchid fanciers, trying to set up the idea that these people are wild, crazy, risk-taking guys and gals -- not far from sociopaths is the general view. His evidence: The conferees sang karaoke and after that, "What went on in the hotel rooms after dark between the orchid growers was anybody's guess."
You could write the same thing about an Amway convention. So?
The serious issue behind this unserious book is how (or if) to conserve orchids that may (or may not) be threatened by collectors, habitat destruction or whatever it is that threatens orchids.
The antagonists are, on one side, amateurs, businessmen and independent scholars; and, on the other, academics and international bureaucrats, who are accused of self-aggrandizement and appropriation. It is not an issue just with orchids or even just about plants. It comes up concerning ancient artifacts, fossils, sunken treasure, even -- in a non-material sense -- myths and legends. See my review of "A Dinosaur Named Sue" for an example with fossils.
A friend of mine who runs an orchid nursery confirms the difficulty. Under a treaty called CITES that purports to protect endangered species, he must prove that his commercial stock (450 species) does not derive from wild-collected plants. Of course, ultimately, any orchid derives from such stock, but CITES has rules. My friend got much of his stock from his teacher, now dead. How can he prove where the teacher obtained it?
My friend could have his business shut down. In the worst instance, he could be shut up in a prison. It has happened to others.
"Orchid Fever" has obtained wide publicity and wide sales. It was aimed at the thoughtless, the sensationalistic and the lascivious, and there are plenty of those people out there. It's sad that probably the most-read book about orchids turns out to be a piece of low-rent crap.
Warning! Obsessively good writing from a master . . ........2007-08-10
Having no interest in orchids whatsoever, I picked up "Orchid Fever" because I have been smitten with Eric Hansen's lucied and entertaining adventure writings (see previous reviews). This book is well researched and very well salted with Hansen's devastating wit and easygoing demeanor.
We are introduced to the orchid universe via the growers, scientists, show judges, "orchid police", and so-called smugglers who turn out to be not so.
Hansen once more captivates with these loosely linked stories of orchid obsessed people and the absurdities of the power brokers so bent on enforcing horticultural regulations that end up ensnaring the wrong people.
"Orchid Fever" is part expose, part travelogue, part literary journalism, and part horticultural history. This really is investigative writing at its very best, at turns tantalizing and educational. This man has a seriously clever wit which keeps the narrative light and fluid.
Hansen's abilities as a writer are superb: he knows his craft as well as any contemporary non-fiction writer. The seven years of creating this wonderfully woven bunch of stories is very much appreciated. From the first sentence, your attention is requisitioned and not released until the last - the mark of a Big League writer I think.
As always with Eric Hansen, my highest kudos.
Extracts: A Field Guide for Iconoclasts
Heavy breathing among the Paphiopedilae.......2007-06-10
"I thumbed through the pages ... Immediately I was confronted with centerfolds showing ... moistened, hot-pink lips that pouted in the direction of tautly curved shafts and heavily veined pouches." - from "Bodice Ripper", a chapter in ORCHID FEVER
A porn mag featuring your favorite XXX-rated stars? Um, no. An orchid catalogue, actually, as described by author Eric Hansen in his narrative exploration of the science, business, hobby, and collecting of orchids, ORCHID FEVER. Who knew flower breeding could be so titillating, or so lucrative? Indeed, as of the turn of the last century, orchids generated about $9 billion of worldwide business annually.
With so much money to be made, it's no surprise that the collection of wild orchids and their transport across national boundaries is so fiercely regulated, ostensibly to protect orchid populations in their natural habitats. But, of course, the cynical will recognize that it's all about the fees generated by the obligatory export licenses and certificates. Indeed, much of ORCHID FEVER is about the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species of Wild Fauna and Flora (CITES), headquartered in Geneva, and its almost Gestapo-like enforcement powers, which, as Eric tells the story, have done virtually nothing to protect free-range orchids and have only increased their demand and value vis-a-vis breeders, hobbyists, and collectors.
Hansen illustrates his subject by traveling the world from California to Borneo to Minnesota to Britain to Germany to Turkey to France to New York and to Holland to interview the field's "horticultural extremists, pioneers, lone rangers, fantasy merchants, flower show flim-flam people, paid informers, rapacious nurserymen, international plant smugglers, pollen thieves, eccentric botanists, corrupt orchid judges, legendary growers, misfits, groupies, and camp followers". Though, as the author states, normal, balanced people are drawn to orchids, he found such only infrequently.
"Behind the cash register (of a neighborhood grocery store) sat a long shelf filled with mass-produced Phalaenopsis hybrids, selling for $19.95; every time I saw them I thought about the California orchid grower who shot and killed his partner and then mutilated the corpse because they couldn't agree on how to breed and sell these supermarket-quality house plants."
Perhaps the most engaging chapter, especially if you like frozen desserts, is "The Fox Testicle Ice Cream", in which Eric journeys to Maras, Turkey, the home of orchid ice cream, salepi dondurma, made from the tubers of the flower genus Orchis. Indeed, the chapter is so informative and interesting that a large segment of it was apparently plagiarized on a website I discovered sponsored by a Turkish-American business alliance. (After I communicated this fact to the author, he replied that it wasn't the first or last time such has happened, and he would pursue getting credit for the entry.)
When I began dating as a teenager in the late sixties, if I really wanted to impress the girl I'd buy a stalk of 5-6 orchids for 3 bucks from an elderly next-door neighbor that grew them. I don't recall that the expenditure ever helped me get lucky, but they sure were impressive in the giving. Nowadays, try buying just one on Mother's Day for less than an hour's pay. After reading Hansen's excellent volume, I better understand the orchid's mystique.
I'd love an update!.......2007-04-08
I read this with jaw agape most of the time. The main reason for this embarrassing state of affairs was the CITES ridiculousness that crops up again and again. Can people in positions of power REALLY be so stupid? Well, yep, they can, sadly enough for the thousands of plants that are destroyed in the name of "development," illegal to save by conservationists.
But the people Hansen meets are equally worthy of a jaw drop. Their passion--there's truly no other word, unless it is obsession--for their orchids simply astounded me. Wonderfully humorous, enlightening reading.
Now that I've read it nearly a decade after many of the encounters described, I am longing for an update. What's become of the CITES laws? Has common sense prevailed? What about the individual scientists and growers? Are they still as enthralled with their plants? What a terrific book, to leave me hungering for so much more!
Orchid Fever.......2007-01-05
Easy reading,interesting,and educational.After reading Orchid Fever,I read a comment in Orchids at Home,and having read Orchid Fever,I realized that ugly,just like beauty,is in the eye of the beholder.
Average customer rating:
- Best Astrology Book
- The absolute best book I've bought so far!
- Fuckin Awesome
- Astrological Kama Sutra and Laughter
- Interesting and enlightening
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Seduction by the Stars: An Astrologcal Guide To Love, Lust, And Intimate Relationships
Ren Lexander , and
Geraldine Rose
Manufacturer: Bantam
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Binding: Paperback
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Customer Reviews:
Best Astrology Book .......2007-01-17
I have never seen a better astrology book than this out there; it pinpoints and targets every sign and really gets into detail about it; they are so accurate and is always on the money about even the little things; For people who just like to read up on their daily horoscopes and read about other signs for fun, this is definately the book for you; you will love it! it's funny and you'll be amazd at how right they are about your sign!
The absolute best book I've bought so far!.......2006-12-06
This is the best book I've bought so far! Besides being my manual on dating its also a great book for meeting new pepole, just find out their sign and I've got them pegged! I won't let my friends or family take this book, I make them all go out and buy it! Its a real easy read and has a comical charm! This book would be a wonderful gift just be sure to buy yourself one! This will be one past down from generation to generation! I LOVE IT!!!!
Fuckin Awesome.......2005-12-29
For those who haven't read:
You don't need to be really advanced in astrology to appreciate this book. All you really need to know is the sun sign of your love interest/lover to benefit from it. The book is divided into 12 sections, one for each sign. For every sign, it talks about: The Lure of that sign, How to Interest that sign, How to Seduce that sign, Sex with that sign, How to Handle a Relationship with that sign, How to End a Relationship with that sign, That sign at their Best/Worst, and lists of sexy and unsexy celebs of that sign.
This book really helped me get the guy I had wanted for two months.
And, after reading the chapter about my own sun sign (Aquarius), I was shocked. The chapter should have had my name written all over it. I felt like that chapter was describing me and only me. It really hit the nail on the head.
In response to other critics:
Yeeah, this book is a little biased, as one person stated earlier. But seriously, who isn't?!
And this book is really funny, agreed.
Astrological Kama Sutra and Laughter.......2005-09-13
This book makes me laugh. I can't wait to try some of these tactics. Generally before I go out with a gentleman, I will cast his chart. We have a topic to discuss immediately himself. Now I know that if I want to successfully compromise a Gemini's Virtue - I have to act fast or he will lose interest. All I have to do is wear dark glasses and the Scorpio man's virtue is mine. Last year I successfully seduced a Virgo in the confederate graveyard. He must have had Sagittarius Rising. Sag's love it in public places, Virgos want to do it in the Shower. It also explains why the Aquarius I encountered last year was such a schmuck. Don't fence him in. The book is right on the mark when it describes how to end a relationship with the Libra that I am. Screaming, pyschodramas, recriminations, nervous breakdowns and attempted suicides are par for the course. Ahhhhhhhhh! The challenge of relationships. This book will be helpful to me as a Professional Astrologer. These are the most common issues that folks want to know about and this book has the answers. Meanwhile, I think I will go find a Leo to seduce, Heck Darn Blast and other words to that effect. I can't afford a Leo. Meanwhile, my new line for the gentlemen is "I've got this great book on Seduction By the Stars. Can I try it on you and see if it works?"
Interesting and enlightening.......2004-09-26
Seduction by the Stars is full of useful tips, no-no's, must-do's and how to handle's. Interesting for sure. This book is about how to interest any zodiac sign with certain 'key tactics'. Then it goes to the next step: once your target is interested, learn how to seduce him or her. The book reveals quite some interesting tactics. Then comes the 'sex part' and how to handle your mate. If you made a mistake and chose the wrong buddy, there is a chapter on how to end the relationship too ;-) All in all this is a very appealing and interesting book. There is something onto it!
Amazon.com
It's dangerous to blame too many of our behaviors and tendencies on raging hormones. We are, after all, creatures of free will. But after reading Theresa Crenshaw's book, you'll never again see your free will as being all that free. The book functions as both an encyclopedia of our attachment-related hormones, telling us exactly what they are and exactly what modern science thinks they do, and a guide to what we can do to get them to keep functioning the way we want them to.
Book Description
Are you in charge of your love life?
If you think so, you're wrong -- hormones control our sex drives and direct our love lives. In The Alchemy of Love and Lust, Dr. Theresa Crenshaw, a renowned sex therapist and researcher, unmasks the hidden agendas of our hormones as we progress through different sexual stages -- from adolescence through old age.
Along with well-known hormones, Dr. Crenshaw introduces lesser known but potent influences that make up our "sex soup." The effects of these chemicals working together and individually offer insight into some compelling issues:
- Do people become addicted to one another through scent and touch?
- Can we determine our romantic destinies by altering our hormonal profiles?
Romantics needn't worry that science will eliminate the mystery of attraction. To the contrary, this program helps us discover romance, rekindle it, and keep it alive. Filled with often surprising information, The Alchemy of Love and Lust explains the effects of our sex hormones and gives us specific, practical suggestions on how to monitor them.
Customer Reviews:
The Alchemy of Love and Lust.......2007-02-22
THis is a fantastic book with information that everybody NEEDS to know. It will greatly improve your understanding of relationships and hopefully your quality of life as you get older. The book is very well researched and very descriptive - though it can be quite difficult to take in all the info at times. However - there are very useful summaries at the end of each section in each chapeter which summarise the main points.
Extremely revealing and a great read.......2006-03-18
Do you want to know what makes men and woman tick?, how they work on the inside?, what chemistry really is? - then look no further. This book is extremely revealing in that ive learnt that even an intimate cuddle can produce a chemical called oxytocin. And thats not all your learn. You will learn much more than a few buzz words in this book, what they are, how they are generated by the body and affected by external elements too - I highly recommend it to anyone that is even the slightest curious about all those feel good chemicals that our bodies produce during cuddling, menopause and even orgasm - its all in here. I found this an excellent book and companion resource for my NLP and psychology study.
understanding hormones influence in Love.......2002-11-10
Everyone should read this book before they think they are madly in love. It will help anyone discern whether it is the chemistry of our hormones or real love, or maybe both. In our lives it is often "hard to see the forest for the trees". This would help alot of people avoid making life mistakes.
Chemical determinism is not enough.......2001-12-15
The author of this book contributes interesting material on the important biochemicals (dopamine, estrogen, progesterone, LHRH, testosterone, prolactin, oxytocin, and others) that influence and help to regulate the universe we think of as "human sexuality." You will learn more than a few things. It seems that a working knowledge of high levels of testosterone can teach us quite a lot. (Women, proceed with caution!)
Unfortunately, she neglects other factors (and there are so many that make up human choices in love and sex: psychology, for example - and whether or not a couple has a single thing besides the kids to talk about after twenty-five years of marriage) that for me the information loses any authority it might have had.
In addition, she has an ax to subtly grind, and it is that men and women in their fifties (and older) have the very best chance for sexual compatability - for a set of specific chemical and biologically determined reasons. This information would seem to argue for couples staying together, but as we know, there are many other factors beyond sexual compatability (which is often fully present in couples who are literally coming apart - in every other way) that must contribute to couples' happiness - not to mention fidelity.
This book has interesting information about biochemicals' influence on our sex and love lives. You will doubtless recognize yourself and your mate in some of her descriptions, but as science it should be taken with a large grain of salt.
Chemical Bonding..........2001-05-05
The insight of how the range of hormones effects the F/M relationship was wonderful! Hormones is what makes love happen...It explains how these hormones control our thought, how we perform, and the part they play in our associations from birth on up. This book also gives information about Progesterone's and Estrogens and the use of these in Hormone Replacement Therapy. It helps you see and understand the actual chemical bonding which happens between F/M.
Book Description
"In our free society, people have the right to choose how they live their lives."-- President George Bush, June 3, 2006 So why does our government
want to censor what you read, hear, and see?
try to limit your access to contraception?
attempt to legislate "good moral values"?
try to brainwash your kids about "abstinence"? These are the kinds of questions Dr. Marty Klein asks--and answers--in his new book, America's War on Sex. With hundreds of examples ripped from today's headlines, he names names, challenges political hypocrisy, and shows the financial connections between government and conservative religious groups that are systematically taking away your rights. Dr. Klein isn't shy about it. He demands to know--as you should demand to know--
If 50 million Americans consume pornography, why does the government dare to regulate it without consulting any consumers? Why do Congressmen listen to "victims of porn" but not healthy adults who use porn?
Now that "abstinence-only" sex education has been proven a failure, why does the government still give it $200 million each year? And how can most of that money go to "faith-based" groups who tell your kids how God feels about their sexual choices?
Why do hundreds of American communities feel they have the right to eliminate legal adult entertainment, claiming "we're not that kind of city"?
Why do family courts have the right to judge the private sexual habits of each parent when making custody decisions?
How can licensed pharmacists and physicians claim they have the right to deny you legal medical care if it violates their "conscience"? Our glorious Constitution guarantees us the widest range of rights civilization has ever seen. Why are those rights systematically undermined and revoked when it comes to sexual expression? Is there a conspiracy to deny us our sexual rights? No, says Marty Klein: "It's worse than a conspiracy. It's a war. They're very open about it--it's a War on Sex." It's a war that threatens the very fabric of our secular democracy. The American Taliban, our own sexual jihadists, want to replace our government with laws based on the Bible, creating a country in which "normal sex" is narrowly defined and no one has the right to alternative sexual information, health care, or personal expression. America is fighting a war on terror to prevent the overthrow of our way of life by fanatics who want to base all law on their strict religious beliefs. It is completely unacceptable that a group of conservative Americans is trying to accomplish the same thing right here.
Customer Reviews:
THE MOST IMPORTANT BOOK FOR CLINICANS TODAY!.......2007-08-14
"The battle lines have been drawn, and it's not just the think tanks and advocacy groups that have stakes in this war. The sexuality of everyone is at risk, making America's War on Sex a must read for all citizens" says Bill Taverner, M.A. Co-Founding Editor, American Journal of Sexuality Education. Author Michael Castleman reports "America's War on Sex--the title may sound a bit hyped, but it's isn't. It's true: Social conservatives have truly declared war on sex, and no one lays out their agenda better than Marty Klein in this frightening and cogently argued book. Frightening because sexual civil rights are in jeopardy. Klein describes how the forces of sex-negativity are working to set up camp in our bedrooms.
Honored CAMFT (California Association of Marriage & Family Therapists -)member, Dr. Marty Klein is making people angry with his newest book, America's War On Sex. And rightfully so! Upon delivering this outstanding book the AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists) Best Book of the Year Award at a sex therapist conference in June, Dr. Joy Davidson stated that she was angry while reading this book and that everyone in America, especially therapist, should be too!
Why be angry while reading Dr. Klein extremely factual, and yet at times humorous, discourse on sex in America today? Because he is right! We, all Americans, are under attack by those who want to robe us of our sexual rights, freedoms and education! In this book Dr. Klein explains with great fines how abstinence only sex education is being promoted and funded by our government despite overwhelming evidence of its failure to deliver the results it has promised, how women's rights to purchase and own vibrators are being legally denied by an increasing amount of state legislators and how sexual mis-information is deliberately being promoted in an effort to take away rights from the GLBT communities!
The anger one experiences when reading this book is not limited to sex therapists or the general public either. It is vital that all psychotherapists read and understand the issues addressed in this book. Our clients come into our offices carrying guilt and shame for engaging in healthy sexual practices after being convinced by negative myths promoted to illuminate sex from our society. They struggle with issue around parenting stemming from fear based messages about children's sexuality. HIV, unwanted pregnancy and the lack of positive sexual expression is the result. We as psychotherapist have an obligation to know the facts about sexuality, to help our clients understand them, to debunk dangerous myths and to support our client's sexual education, personal development and positive sexuality within couples. That is why I say America's War On Sex is the most important book in our field today and is a must read by all clinicians!
Stephen L. Braveman, M.A., L.M.F.T., D.S.T.
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist # MFC 28926
AASECT Certified Diplomate of Sex Therapy
AASECT Certified Supervisor and Certified CE Provider
Gender Specialist - Clinical Member of WPATH
Tantra Facilitator-Practitioner
AASECT Western Region Representative
CAMFT Past President - Monterey Chapter
Author:
- "Innovative Methods of Treating Patients with Sexual Trauma"
in "Innovations in Clinical Practice: Focus on Sexual Health, 2007"
- "CPR for Your Sex Life: How to Breathe Life Into a Dead, Dying or Dull Sex Life"
(Co-Author: Mildred Brown, Ph.D.), 2007.
Review from a clinical sexologist.......2007-04-21
What I like most about Dr. Klein and his new book, America's War on Sex, is that he's not afraid to battle the bullies and bigots who have hijacked our country. With facts and footnotes up the wazzoo, Dr. Klein's no holds barred, easy to read and humorous polemic is a must for any American who cares about their freedom.
Great Book.......2007-01-11
I had to read this book for a Human Sexuality class for a graduate class and even though the class is over and I did not finish reading the book I cant wait to finish it. The book is great at explaining topics such as teen pregnancy and sex education. A MUST READ!!!
FUNNY AND INFORMATIVE.......2007-01-10
I thought this book was very well written! It made alot of points that I wasn't aware of!
America's Sexophobia Exposed.......2006-12-12
Marty Klein's expert analysis of our sexually repressed society reminds me of H.L.Mencken's definition of a puritan as a person with the terrible fear that someone, somewhere,is having a good time. And with our born-again president insisting on funding nothing but abstinence only sex ed in our schools, we have the dubious distinction of having the highest teenage unwed pregnancy rate of all the industrial nations. It's a terrific, enlightening read.
Book Description
From the award-winning photographer of Aperture’s seminal Living with the Enemy, now in its fourth printing, comes Donna Ferrato’s second book, Love and Lust, a provocative look at human intimacy. Ferrato’s first book tackled the brutal subject of battered women, making an important issue public. Now, Ferrato turns her eye on the theme of love in its many facets, from the emotional bond of a boy and his dog, to full-blooded orgies and other lusty behavior.
The constant question regarding Ferrato’s work is, “How does she get these astonishing pictures?” Readers will wonder the same as they page through these bold, sometimes shockingly intimate photographs. This is anything but a sentimental journey. Non-judgmental, wide-eyed, and embracing myriad expressions of human emotion, Ferrato moves with assurance from puppy love to orgasm, from a peck on the cheek between friends to sexual role-playing to S&M. In these photographs, representing nearly thirty years of her work, Ferrato is never heavy-handed or sensational. Rather, there is always the sense that she is winking at the viewer, encouraging a relaxed acceptance of all the positive expressions of human feeling, be they childlike or fabulously steamy.
Customer Reviews:
Love and Lust.......2004-06-09
Long awaited, this provocative monograph -- Ferrato's second book from Aperture -- presents an exploration of love in all of its physical manifestations. Her optimistic and penetrating gaze finds love in all the right (and gorgeously wrong) places -- "from puppy love to orgasm, from a peck on the cheek between friends to sexual role-playing to S&M." Her physical proximity to the subjects creates a genuine feeling of intimacy, which permeates her entire body of work and highlights love's common experience across conflicting social mores. Throughout -- whether violent, broken, transgressive, base, ephemeral, elated, quotidian, or eternal -- love is present, and Ferrato sees in it, beauty. Without moralizing or patronizing, Ferrato successfully reveals love, in its varied manifestations, as something shared and familiar, ever in motion and ever reborn.
Love And Lust, Donna Ferrato.......2004-05-25
In perusing the remarkable new book of photographs,"Love and Lust", I was reminded of two great literary artists. Thoreau and Whitman. When Whitman wrote his poem " Beginners" he was thinking of such creators. " How dear and dreadful they are to the earth." Thoreau in one of his little known journal passages mused on what it would be like for groups of young people to make love in the open fields.It would be a beautiful and natural sight, he thought.This creative approach to sensuality is typical of great minds. Such forerunners, " Shake things up" and move humanity forward.Donna is well known for her book on domestic violence " Living With The Enemy" She is fully as candid in her depiction of the largeness of our emotions in the areas of love and sexuality as she has been in the world of violence and abuse."Love and Lust" chronicles over twenty years of her photographic studies of sensuality and affection.She moves from the center of family life,as Nell Dorr did, into the greater world.It is a paradox that we humans are often more afraid to explore our love feelings than our violence.Donna dedicates her book to " The 'Bonobo monkeys'they have something to teach the more advanced primates about "Making love, not war" The poetic eye of this photographer caresses ,with childlike candor, the objects chosen for attention.Her vision has the variety of a kaleidoscopic circus dream of Ray Bradbury. There is much shock value as well.The book is not for the squeamish. The Bizarre is shown beside the everyday.She juxtaposes gay and straight young and old, nuns and ghetto people, swingers,rich, poor and middle class.All those playing at the myriad games of sex.This is an all encompassing vision.In so many ways we reach out for the love and pleasure we seek. Often it appears in forms we might never have expected, but those forms may prove non-the-less valid.Study this book carefully. It is a work of art even to the binding, which has the feel of pliant skin. "He who touches this book , touches a man.." Whitman said of "Leaves of Grass" We are touched by an incredibly honest woman,in this book.Her art and bravery deserve laurels.
Book Description
In a powerful blend of history, psychology, and storytelling, Naomi Rosenblatt reinterprets the stories of the women of the Old Testament. Through her lens, we view these women with a new understanding, marveling at the very modern dilemmas and problems they confronted. Women everywhere will recognize their own struggles to love, to mother, to succeed in relationships, and to survive their way through a complicated world.
Customer Reviews:
After the Apple.......2007-07-01
I loved this book.It was wonderful,I higly recommend this book to scholars of the Divine Feminine and Biblical Scholarship.This gives the women of the Bible a wonderful overview.It is a positive and humanizing way to look at the Matriarchs of the Jewish Faith and Christian as well.Angela Miller.
Like a Textbook.......2007-04-08
I was so excited to read this after seeing the author on television. I thought it would be similar to THE RED TENT which I highly recommend. However, AFTER THE APPLE reads like a textbook and is not compelling. It would be a good book for religious school or studies although it is not an interesting read. I had to put it down, unfinished, which I rarely do.
Insights into little-discussed stories.......2007-03-27
Rosenblatt, whose earlier book I have also read, can always be relied upon to provide a new perspective on the Bible's oft-told stories. This book, which adopts a feminist perspective, is quite strong and thoughtful. Rosenblatt's retellings of lesser-known stories such as that of Judah and Tamar, or that of David and Abigail, have considerable force. It had been a long time since I had looked at the Abigail tale, and Rosenblatt added a great deal to my understanding.
Some of the discussions of the well-known stories (Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebecca) will not seem new to people who know those stories well, but this book is well worth reading.
Thoroughly Modern Women of The Tanakh.......2007-01-19
Rosenblatt's exquisite, readable little book shines yet another light on the timelessness of the ancient texts upon which she draws. Some will no doubt disagree with the "feminist revision" they'll see in this modern look at famaliar stories. Others will quote passages and say, "I told you so." So, what else is new? Thousands of years of study, debate, dispute, and even violence have not yet yielded a single, uniform interpretation for either The Tanakh or its Christian and Muslim counterparts. Why should this overview of Biblical heroines be any different? Rosenblatt adds her fresh, powerful voice to the ongoing, ageless dialogue. Read this book; love it; hate it; share it; think about it; talk about it, but don't ignore it. You deserve the best, and Rosenblatt delivers.
Clearly written and thought provoking.......2006-08-30
I had been looking for a book presenting Bible stories in an accessible way. While the focus is narrowed to the stories of women, I got far more than access to Bible stories with "After the Apple".
I liked that Rosenblatt explained how concepts originated. For instance, the word commonly translated as "rib" (Adam's) technically means side. I also liked that she put stories from the different Bible chapters together. For instance she tells how how David grew from the lyre playing shephard boy who slew Goliath to being a King.
In Sunday School we drew pictures of Jacob's ladder. We learned about the beauty of David's "royal city" and sang about it. We did NOT learn about Jacob's concubines nor of David ignoring his daughter's rape by his son. With no paternal protection, she could have been stoned were it not for another brother who had a moral sense and or cared about her. In the end, David moarns for this son... not the fate of the daughter.
The Bible's world is very disturbing. Death by stoning for rumored infractions is a threat for all, especially women. The masses most likely lived on subsistence diets. It seems to be a Darwinian world and the male id, among the elite, appears to be unrestrained.
Other than the Queen of Sheba (somewhat), the women cited in this book are immortalized in the Bible for their sexual interactions (whether in marital or union or not) with men. It makes you weep for all the other women who did not/could not approach the palace, a sheltering tent or even a smile. What of the homely/ugly, the unsponsored, the sick? The presumably better lives of these few women cited causes one to wonder about the foundations of this society.
Rosenblatt gives these stories a very sympathetic treatment. They add to the understanding of history and ourselves.
I give this book 5 stars because so much complex material is digested for lay people like me to understand it. I cannot say I enjoyed it because there was too much repression and pain in the lives of these (few) heroines. Empathy among the characters, particularly the men to the women, is rare.
The inspiration for me is not in the stories but in how far societies of the world have progressed since this time.
Book Description
Say it loud and say it proud!
Or say it low and say it slow.
Anyone can learn to speak the language of lust. Here to help is Dirty Talk, an ultra-feminine, far-from-prim primer that pulls together everything a lady needs to know to loosen her tongue. With a velvety cover and enticing illustrations throughout, this little handbook starts off with loads of techniques to build erotic vocabulary and tips to tackle stage fright, then moves on to mastering the art of talking dirty deux. To wrap it all up, the book shows how a minx-in-the-making can raise dirty talk to the next level, with tips for taking erotic lingo outside the boudoir. Even the most ladylike will find lots of seductive options, proving that dirty talk doesn't have to be cheap, unless, of course, it's meant to be...
Product Description
You've heard about it, you've read about it, most of us have been through it, the various stages of lesbian love. It starts with the lingering looks across the room at an interesting stranger, romantic e-mails, flowers, and wearing leather on your first date. Then once you have her, stage two kicks off with all night sex sessions that leave you sore but still wanting more. Soon you don't even want to leave the house for months, and some of your friends even forget your name. Then, if you're lucky (and not on the second date, mind you), the third stage comes around and you've settled into the comfy couch of your relationship. Come join Nghosi Books down memory lane or take this journey for the very first time as we introduce you to ultimate pleasure in our New Voices Series of longing, lust, and love!
Customer Reviews:
im feeling longing, lust, and love!!.......2007-08-20
I'd like to start off by saying this book is extraordinary, hypnotic, and extremely erotic. Also, the stories told in this book cerate a mindblowing fantacy. This book is truely a bible for lesbian and bisexual women. You will surely find new ideas and positions to experience with your partner. I reccomend this to all black lesbians.
Wow is an understatement...........2007-07-14
I have been waiting for a book of this caliber for quite some time.... and thankfully, it was created! Amazing stories, excellent editing and details. The story "Bringing Up Daddy" is itself worth the price of this book... and then some. I'm buying multiple copies to give as Christmas presents this year. Every lesbian of color should own this book...
Great read........2007-05-26
I pre-ordered this from Ngoshi Books (the publishing company). The editor of the book broke the stories into 3 sections. Longing, Lust, and Love. All were very good. My favorite was by Laurinda Brown. Very very sexy.
Customer Reviews:
A Brilliant Compilation of Short Stories.......2007-05-26
Harlan Coben's short story "Entrapped" is about a woman whose husband goes missing. When she arrives home from the police station, she finds an imposter husband waiting for her and the charade begins.
All of the stories are filled with common elements that make for a great mystery; secrets, deceit, love, lust, drama and of course the most important ingredient, murder. Readers will find at least one of their favorite writer's works and be able to sample several new writers as well.
R. L. Stine tells a tale of a murdering best friend who's left with his victim's "talking" dog. The dog witnessed the whole murder. That, combined with paranoia and guilt, makes for a well written and very imaginative story.
A few of the writers that readers will look forward to include Lee Childs, Ridley Pearson, R.L Stine, Laura Lippman and P.J Parrish.
This is a Book You'll Lend to Others Yes, But You Won't Part With Owning Until Your Death!.......2007-03-26
Anthologies of short stories by different authors are usually a collection of a few gems, a few all right stories and a few fillers. Death Do Us Part is a collection where all but two are great reads, they are not all masterpieces granted, but there are more than the usual number of those as well. I was interested in this book just to read Coben's story Entrapped as I had not read it before when it was first published in 1997, and its pretty hard to come across Mary Higgins Clark's Mystery Magazine let alone that edition to read it anyway. Coben is not the only great author here, so many others have written great tales and the other authors are all freshly published as well. Like all great short story collections, Death Do Us Part gives the reader a chance to sample authors they've heard of but never read before as well as introduces to them lesser known authors to add to their lists of future reads to track down. There's also a brief and very helpful summary of each author at the end of the collection, so those looking know where to begin.
In reviewing what the stories within are about I'll start first with my favourite ones (undoubtedly your list would start differently). My list starts with the editor and Coben's story Entrapped. A wife reports her husband missing to police only to discover he is at home. Only the person at home does not look or sound like her husband but he is the same guy the police show her that is in the photograph she gave them. Is she going insane? Could he really be her husband after all?
Wifey a story by normally child and young adult author R. L. Stine proves to the world that he can write sensational stories for any market. Wifey is the nickname Jake a neighbour of Frank the owner has given Frank's dog Ruby since they behave like a married couple and are never apart. Jake hates dogs, but is ecstatic that his neighbour entrusted him to inherit the beast as it showed to the world what Frank thought of their friendship. Ruby though makes Lassie look like Forrest Gump and will stop at nothing to avenge her master's murder.
Till Death Do Us Part, Tim Maleeny. The title story of this collection is the great tale about the sixtieth anniversary of a feud between an old couple who do not believe in divorce. They are both extremely intelligent and every year play the "fair play", dinner game of trying to poison the other through each others dishes.
Lee Child's Safe Enough has a guy from the city taking up work on houses in the country where notices a beautiful women. He stalks her and discovers she has a violent husband When the husband disappears he is the only one who can prove the wife was not around the murder scene when it happened but obviously he can't supply this news to the police to prove her innocence as they will want to know why he was stalking her.
The Home Front by Charles Ardai is set in America while World War II rages on in Europe. Too old to go to war Ray Harper is a government agent who catches petrol retailers selling rationed fuel on the black market. One such arrest is Rick Kelly who is killed in Harper's car as Harper was giving Kelly a lecture about how his actions are helping Hitler and why isn't he over there anyway etc instead of watching the road. Sacked by the government and with injuries Harper is down on his luck and one the streets. Luckily he comes across a kind woman who offers him food and board if he helps her run her garage.
The Last Flight by Bredan DuBois has a man booking a joy flight in the type of plane he flew in the war over the ocean to scatter his wife's ashes and obtain closure.
A Few Small Repairs by Jeff Abbott has a hospital ridden father who is dying a slow painful death asking a son he had disowned to help him end his life.
Blarney by Steve Hockensmith is the tale of a few drinks at the pub by a group of writers after a conference where they run into one of the only non boring speakers. This old Irishman offers to teach them what it is to be a writer if they buy him a pint.
The Masseuse by Tim Wohlforth is the story of a man whose dream comes true when his masseuse offers to cook and pleasure him in exchange for food and board and a bit of spending money while she studies for a new career.
Homecoming by the mother and son team pseudonym Charles Todd, has a wife of a guy fighting in Europe during World War I discovering an intruder in her house, however even though she knows he's there can never seem to find him so wonders if stress is making her go insane.
Part Light, Part Memory is an African slave girl's story of her thirst for vengeance when her father was hung for looking at the American master's wife.
Queeny by Ridley Pearson is the tale of a guy whose wife attracts the attention of a man while running in the park which she tells him about. The wife soon disappears.
One True Love by Laura Lippman is the story of a high class prostitute who is recognised and blackmailed by a parent her son runs into while playing sport.
The Cold, Hard Truth by Rick McMahon is the tale of a rural police office recounting the story of how he first met death row prisoner Jesse Brashear and the cold hard truth that good people can do bad things.
Cyberdatedotcom (note Amazon ridiculously keeps replacing the actual title with [...] so that's as close as I can put) by Tom Savage is the chat room transcript from a dating website where two under aged kids take a liking to each other.
Pushed or Was Fell by Jay Brandon has Walt a loner, meeting a girl, quickly marrying and setting out on cruise ship honeymoon then realising he doesn't love with devastating consequences.
One Shot by P.J. Parrish has Stuart returning to visit his old home which is now for sale and reliving the traumatic changing event of his life.
Heat Lightning, William Krueger although readable is one of the lesser quality contributions to this collection. A story of a guy who is having an affair while his wife lies in a coma in the bedroom upstairs.
Chellini's Solution was the only story I don't really think is worth reading, it's about an Italian guy whose enemies gloat as they tell him his wife is cheating on him and of course the actions he takes afterwards.
This is a great collection of short stories and one you'll want to keep forever. Not as good as this but still a good recent collection of similar stories to these I've read is Dangerous Women, edited by Otto Penzler.
Fantastic.......2006-11-14
To sum the book up in one word that would be it, Fantastic!! This is such a wonderful collections of stories. Each story different from the other but all keeping the same themes. My favorites were Safe Enough, Home Front, Till Death Do Us Part and Entrapped. However all were fantastic. I recommend that you get this book, you will not be disappointed.
Nineteen great mystery stories.......2006-09-24
This anthology of 19 truly great mystery stories is presented by the Mystery Writers of America (a fine association of not only authors, but readers too!) is edited by Harlan Coben. It is as perfect as an anthology can be.
Each of the nineteen stories is from an established writer. Most have won or been repeatedly nominated for various awards. No warmed-over, previously published material here: all nineteen stories are original. Nor are there excerpts of the writer's novels: this stuff is fresh and new. Coben wisely doesn't present the author bios until after all the stories and much to credit of editor and authors alike, the bios aren't pure puffery and hyperbole.
I can't tell you what my favorite was, because all nineteen stories are terrific. Jeff Abbott, author of "Panic" and "Fear", two fine thrillers, sets up a tense father-son-wife story. R. L. Stine provides something of a "shaggy dog" story that involves love in a strange way. Harlen Coben presents a story of a very crafty wife. Tim Wohlforth contributes a gem about a man's ideal relationship that leads to an unfortunate bit of snooping. All nineteen stories are simply great reads.
Oh - and if you didn't guess already, all nineteen stories are true to the cover blurb: they involve love, lust and murder.
Good stuff. Not to be missed.
Jerry
Human nature gone bad at its best.......2006-09-22
Reviewed by Cherie Fisher for Reader Views (09/06)
"Mystery Writers of America Presents Death Do Us Part: New Stories about Love, Lust and Murder" is a must read for anyone who loves stories about mystery, misery and murder. Harlan Coben, the editor, brought together some of today's best mystery writers to create this book of 19 short stories, including one of his own "Entrapped". As Coben tells us in the introduction, most of these stories are going to end badly for at least one person, maybe more. The commonalities of the stories end there.
"Queeny", written by Ridley Pearson, is a story about a famous mystery writer whose wife is brutally murdered and he is mistakenly forced to stand trial for it. After what has happened, no matter what the outcome, and I won't tell you what it is, no one can win. Then there is the City electrician in "Safe Enough" by Lee Child, who moves to the country to be with a woman who is suspected of killing her husband, but did she really?
A few war stories come into play, the most poignant one being "Home Coming" by Charles Todd, a story about an English woman who becomes frightened of her home because it feels like someone has invaded it while her husband is away fighting in the war. AND, the most chilling story of all is Cyberdate.com by Tom Savage, which is about two teenage kids (are they really who they say they are?) who meet on the internet and the boy finally convinces the girl to meet in person. How many of us live with that worry about our children doing exactly the same thing? Revenge is even thrown into the mix with stories like "The Last Flight" by Brendan DuBois.
My two personal favorite stories were "Till Death Do Us Part" by Tim Maleeny and "Wifey" by R.L. Shine. "Till Death Do Us Part" is a about a chemist and botanist celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary by each preparing a meal for the other. What is on the menu turns out to be the surprise. "Wifey" is a dog who witnesses the brutal murder of her master and is forced to live with the murderer afterwards. Wifey does not take this lying down.
Other contributors to this collection of great stories are Charles Ardai, Bonnie Hearn Hill, Steve Hockensmith, William Kent Krueger, Rick McMahan, P.J. Parrish, Tim Wohlforth, Jeff Abbott, Jim Fusilli, Laura Lippman and Jay Brandon. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and recommend it highly. The short stories make it great for reading before bed, taking to the beach, or if you have small children and frequent small slots of time to read.
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Books Index
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